Moments That Change Us
by Michaela123
Summary: What if JJ and David's chance encounter changed the path our their lives forever? Rolling back the clock, we'll follow them from that moment, and beyond.
1. Chapter 1

**I have no idea where the idea for this story came from - let us just call it the enigma that is my mind! I **_**was**_** sitting here trying to think up ideas for my other stories, but no, this one just kind of popped into my head, so I decided to run with it. I'm not really sure where it will end up, but I do have the first few chapters planned out in my head, and hopefully I will be able to keep them set out that way, I just need to work out some kind of order, and how I want things to happen. The story starts in the past, and then it will slowly progressed forward, but I mean, really slowly, like each chapter is going to be a day (although, at some point I probably will have to do a bit of a jump or the story will end up like 2000 chapters long!) I will have to alter some of the things that have happened on the show to be able to make them fit into the storyline, but that should be easy. I hope! I am not sure if this will result in a **_**happy**_** JJ and Rossi relationship. I guess we shall see. I'm not exactly starting this story at the best time - on Monday afternoon, I go away till Thursday afternoon. I will have my laptop so I can write this (and my other stories) while I am away, but I'm not sure if I will be able to post it. I should have internet access whilst I'm away, but how much time I will have, I don't know, but I will try to keep up the posting. Anyway, I hope that you like it - let me know what you think!**

_Georgetown University Campus Book Store.  
Washington D.C.  
May 23, 2001._

Twenty two year old, Georgetown University senior Jennifer Jareau, stood silently at the back of the campus book store, as she watched him talk about his newest book. He, of course, was the so called legendary FBI profiler, David Rossi, that until five minutes ago, she had never heard of, but now, she couldn't tear her eyes away from him.

She was mesmerized by his words. The tone and fluidity of his voice. She could feel the goose bumps forming on her arms as his eyes caught her. This was something new to her. She'd been to more than one open talk in the past, but never had she been so captured by one before. And the first time this happened, she didn't expect it to be able serial killers. It couldn't be the serial killers. It had to be the person at the centre of this, that was making her feel this way.

She sat and listened to him talk about his book and his job for an hour before she was brave enough to ask him a question, and even this, she could feel the butterflies dancing in her stomach as she spoke. What the hell was going on with her? She didn't even know this man, and yet he had turned her into a wreck.

As she watched the rest of the students file out of the book store, she couldn't move. Couldn't breath. She just sat, rooted to her seat, staring into space. For some reason, she wasn't ready to leave his company. He was like a drug to her. She felt like she needed him to live - and she had only 'known' him a couple of hours.

Turning as she felt a firm hand being pressed on her shoulder, she was alarmed to see the object of her current fractured mental state, staring back at her. What was going on? She was aware that he was talking to her, but her brain wouldn't let her process the words. She thought that he was asking her if she was okay, but she couldn't be sure, and until she could, she wasn't going to answer and make a complete fool of herself.

Jennifer wasn't sure what was wrong with her, she just knew that the room was getting extremely warm. Were the walls closing in? Oh god, Jennifer! Get a grip! You are an intelligent, independent and capable woman, and you have managed worse situations than the one the man in front of her has thrust you into. You can do this!

"Miss? Are you okay?" David's voice cut through her thoughts like a knife. "Can you hear me?"

"I…uh…yeah. I'm okay." Forcing a smile, she looked up at him. "It's just a bit warm in here. It threw me off balance for a minute."

"I think you should get some fresh air, you look a little flushed and I don't want you passing out. Come with me, we'll take a walk."

"No, I'll be okay. You have more important things to do." JJ argued, rising unsteadily from her seat.

"Not right now I don't. Come on…"

"Jennifer." She supplied, talking his hand unconsciously as it was offered.

"Come on, Jennifer. You are arguing with one of the best right now, and yours will be a futile battle. A short walk is all that I am proposing, and after you sat through my entire talk, I believe that it is the least I can do."

Sighing, she admitted defeat. "Okay, a quick walk. Where are we going to go?"

"No where in particular. Lets just walk and see where it takes us." David proposed.

"That sounds good to me."

Leading her out of the store and into the warm air, he smiled at her. They walked around the University campus for a while before venturing off into the world, and before they knew it, three hours had passed "So, I am guessing that you are a student at the University? I forgot to ask before."

"I am, I'm a senior."

"Ah, so you are just about to go off into the big bad world. Do you have any idea what you are going to do next?"

"I didn't, well, until today, now it all seems perfectly clear. I think I know exactly what I want to do."

"Care to enlighten me?" David questioned, he knew there was something special about this woman.

"The FBI. I can't say I have ever thought about joining it, but the way you spoke about it with such passion, I definitely want to learn more. I know that it is a hard and challenging job, but that's what I want. I don't want to do something stereotypical, where I do the exact same thing day in and day out. I _want_ to be challenged."

"That's a good choice to make. Especially as you don't seem to be looking at it with rose coloured glasses on. It's not easy, but if it's a challenge you are looking for, I would say you are on the right path. It is a remarkably rewarding job, and I must say, I do miss it sometimes." Looking into her eyes, David smiled. "How about I take you out for dinner, and I will tell you all about the ins and the outs of the FBI?"

"No, David. I could never ask you to do that. I have taken up way too much of your time today."

"Jennifer, I want to take you out for dinner. I would never have offered if I wasn't sure. It is always good to know exactly what you are getting into before you sign up."

"You don't want to spend the evening with me. I have already taken up most of your day."

"Jennifer, do you really think that I would be stupid enough not to want to go out to dinner with a beautiful and intelligent woman? If you don't come out for dinner with me, I will be spending the evening alone, probably with a beer in front of the television. Tell me, do you have plans tonight?"

"Apart from doing some studying for my finals, no, I don't have any plans."

"Where will you be eating then?" David questioned, a knowing smile forming on his face.

"I'll probably just grab a sandwich and head back to my room."

"Well, what is the point of both of us spending the night alone? You know that it makes sense for us to spend it together. I like your company, Jennifer."

"Okay, okay." Jennifer sighed, over dramatically, grinning at him. "You win, but you have to give me time to get changed."

"Don't be ridiculous, you look beautiful. Let's just head back to the book store and I'll get my car keys, and we can set off.

**********

_Georgia Brown's Restaurant.  
Washington D.C.  
May 23, 2001._

One hour and forty five minutes later, David parked his car outside a quiet and quant restaurant on the outskirts of Washington D.C.

The drive had been quiet, but it was in no way awkward. They both just enjoyed each others company, and not from lack of trying, Jennifer couldn't remember the last time that she had ever felt so relaxed, but she wasn't sure why she was doing this. She had only just met this man, but he she was letting him take her out for dinner.

Was this a date?

Should she ask?

Jennifer mentally scolded herself. Of course it wasn't a date, he was just feeling sorry for her, and he was giving her a sympathetic ear. He was handsome, smart, and very well accomplished, so why on Earth would he be interested in her? But even knowing that he would never be interested in her, did not stop her stomach doing back flips when he slipped his arm around her waist as he lead her into the restaurant.

"So, David, what was the best part of being in the FBI?" Jennifer asked as they walked along the river after their meal.

"The best part…when you manage to find your guy before they are able to hurt anyone else, or the look on the victims face when you tell them you have found the guy who hurt them…it's something you will never be able to leave behind completely."

"Which is why you write your books." Jennifer added.

"Exactly, but Jennifer, there is enough time to talk about work later, now, I want to get to know you."

"What do you want to know?"

"Where did you grow up? Do you have any siblings. I don't know why, but I feel the need to get to know you."

"Well, I grew up in Easy Allegheny, in Pennsylvania. I played soccer growing up and that's how I managed to escape our small town, but I have a sister and two brother's who still live there and are very much happy to live the small town life, but I have always wanted more." Stopping to look out at the river, she smiled. "I love my family, but I couldn't do it any longer. There is a lot of pressure on you to conform when you live in a small place like that, and I didn't like it. I wanted to be able to spread my wings and do things my way."

"That's an extremely brave thing to do."

"Mmm. My parents aren't exactly pleased. They want me to come home, and marry someone who will keep me there for the rest of my life, where as, as I have told you, I want to find a challenge."

"That's good." Inching his body closer, David wrapped his arms around her as she shivered. "You're cold."

"What is going on here, David? Why did you ask me out to dinner? Why do you want to know about me?"

"I don't know, Jennifer. I don't know, I just feel like I need to be around you. I've never believed that you can have an instant connection with someone, but with you, that's exactly what I feel like I can have."

"You have only known me a few hours."

Turning her body, he pressed himself up to her. "I know, but it feels like I have known you forever. I watched you walk into that book store today, and I just knew that I had to get to know you. Tell me that you don't feel it, and I will back off."

"I do feel it, but…isn't this so fast?" Jennifer asked, why was she trying to push him away?

"So what if it is? Isn't it best to just follow what you feel?"

"It is…but-"

"No, buts Jennifer. I don't want to leave tonight and know I will never see you again."

"You have only known me since this morning. How can you say that?"

"I just can. Tell me you feel the same."

"I do, David, but-"

"I said no buts. For once I am following what I feel, and now, I am going to do something I have been waiting to do all night."

Lowering his head, he pressed his lips to hers, falling into a kiss, that made them feel like they were the only two people left on the planet, and at that moment, if you told them that they were, they would have believed them.


	2. Chapter 2

**I know I said there wouldn't be time jumps and each day would just follow on - it will, but I have to press the fast forward button just a little here, other wise, I will be writing thirty different dates between JJ and Rossi, and that seems a bit much…even for me! Plus, I don't think writing each day separately will be logical, so I'll just see how it goes. I think there will probably be time jumps until we get into the present day. It is just easier for me that way! P.S. Trying to write whilst watching Dancing On Ice AND trying to plan a holiday to California is a bad idea!**

**THIS CHAPTER IS RATED M!  
NOT FOR CHILDREN**

_David Rossi__'__s Condo.  
Washington D.C.  
July 24, 2001._

For eight weeks, David and Jennifer danced around each other. Sharing facts about themselves over dinner, while trying to comprehend exactly what was happening to them. Neither of them had ever believed in love at first sight, but what else could this be?

Jennifer didn't care anymore. In the short space of time that she had known this man, she had come to trust him before anyone else in the world, and tonight, she trusted him enough to let him make her his. What she didn't trust, was if she would be enough for him. She wasn't exactly experienced in that area, and from what David had told her, she knew he was. David was the only the second man she had ever been with. What if she didn't know how to please him?

Excusing herself to the bathroom, she grabbed her overnight bag from the hall way. She was going to make this special. She didn't care how ridiculous it may seem to David, she needed to make it special.

Stripping her clothes off, she slipped into something that was a little more suited to the evenings activities, before sorting her hair and make up. Then, she made quick work of 'setting the mood' in the bedroom. This was going to be special.

Taking one last look at herself in the mirror before she started down the hallway, she hoped to God that he liked what he saw.

Standing in the door way, she took a deep breath. "David?"

"What is it Jen-" Turning slowly, David's words immediately stopped when he saw her standing there. She was beautiful. No, she was more than beautiful if that was possible. Rising from his seat, he met her in three strides. "Jennifer, I don't know what to say."

Her eyes growing wide, she tried to cover herself. "Oh, god. Did I read this wrong? I thought…"

"What? No, no. Jennifer, that's not what I mean. I mean, I don't know what to say because no one has ever gone through this trouble for me before." Dropping a tender kiss to her lips, he cupped her hands in his face, lifting her head so their eyes met. "Are you sure about this? I don't want you to think you have to do this to make me happy. I will wait as long as you want."

"I want this, David. I want you. I wouldn't be here if I didn't, and I am ready, I just…"

"You just, what sweetheart?"

Her cheeks tinted red, Jennifer looked down. "I…umm…I've only ever been with one man, David. No one has ever really meant enough to me, too. What if I don't know how to make you happy?"

"You already do make me happy, but if you are worried, allow me to teach you." Lifting Jennifer into his arms, David made his way to his bedroom with her, gasping as he saw exactly what kind of an effort she had gone too. "Baby, you did all of this?"

"I did. I wanted tonight to be special for both of us." Jennifer whispered.

"It is." Settling Jennifer down on the edge of the bed, David knelt in front of her, drawing her into a fierce kiss, as he ran his hands down her satin covered breasts. He could feel her tense her body to his touch. Before he could make her body his own, he needed to relax her. "Baby, don't worry. We will go as soon as you like. Just trust me."

"I trust you David."

Moving the kisses down the length of her neck, he nipped and sucked gently at the pulse point in her neck, smirking to himself when she arched into him involuntarily. While his mouth continued it's torturous assault on her neck, his hands were caressing her thighs, before tugging the satin material of her negligee up. He took his time, relishing in the softness of her skin beneath his fingers, and the taste of her skin on his lips.

Pulling the negligee over her head, he finally got to see her body completely open to him. "God, Jennifer, you are stunning." Trailing his lips further down her body, he lightly palmed her breasts, before taking one of her hard nipples between his teeth.

Moaning, Jennifer arched further into him, pushing her body further into the hot, wet depths of his both. She had never known this kind of attention before, and she could feel her senses beginning to go into over drive. She didn't know how much longer she could last. "David…I-"

"Shh. Just enjoy it, baby."

Easing her body so she was lying down, he burned a pathway of kisses down her lithe stomach as she writhed beneath him. Lowering himself further still, he kissed the inside of each of her thighs, before placing a long, hot kiss at the heart of her femininity.

Jennifer hadn't been expecting it, and it took her by surprise, as a new wave of passion rushed through her. She tried to speak, but no words came. Moaning David's name as he took the small bundle of nerves at the top of her femininity between his teeth, she didn't know how she would ever be able to repay him for the special attention he was giving her.

It didn't take long before the stars began to dance behind her eyes, and for Jennifer to feel the ultimate release, as the pleasure run through her.

Holding her close, David let her regain her senses and bearings, as he gently kissed her temple, and held her close to his still fully clothed body.

After a few minutes, Jennifer felt the fog lift from her brain, as she opened her eyes, to stare into the dark, penetrating gaze of the man who had mad her feel so good. "David…thank you."

"You don't have to thank me, do you have any idea what seeing you like that, did to me?"

Running her hand over his clothes cover erection, she smirked. "I think I have a bit of an idea."

"Mmm, and I think it's about time we did something about that." Quickly stripping his clothes, David hovered his body over hers.

"Do you have a condom?"

"Of course." Pressing a quick kiss to her lips, her dug his hand into the bedside table before pulling out a small package. "I always say it pays to be prepared."

"It does." Taking the condom out of his hand, she shifted slightly before rolling it onto him, giving him a few strokes first for good measure.

"Are you sure you are ready, Jennifer? You can tell me to stop at any time."

"I'm sure, David. Make love to me."

Positioning himself at her opening, he slowly thrust into her, enjoying the feeling for the first time, and to him, she felt perfect. Hot. Tight. Everything he could ever want. Quickly falling into a rhythm that satisfied them both, he thrust faster or harder to her demands. Silently loving the fact that she was so vocal.

"God, Jennifer. Shit, baby!" David moaned, as she tensed her muscles around him.

"Harder! Please! Harder, David!"

Following her commands, her reached between them, brushing his thumb over her sensitive nerves as he felt the orgasm approaching. How could this woman have thought that she wouldn't be enough for him?

Feeling the orgasm claim her, Jennifer screamed David's name as she thrashed from her position under him. She hadn't felt anything so extreme before. Sex really did feel so much better when it is with someone you care about. And that was enough to send David spiralling over with her.

Holding her close as they both came down, David just stared at Jennifer. Trying to wonder how a bitter and cold old man like him could have something so wonderful in his life. "Jennifer? I didn't hurt you, did I, baby?"

"What? You could never hurt my David, never."

"Good, Jennifer, I know it is early, but I think, no, I know that I am in love with you."

Turning in his arms to face him, she smiled. "I love you too David."

Sleeping naked in his arms that night brought a new sense of closeness and contentment that Jennifer wasn't used to. She felt safe with him, and all she could do, was hope that it never ended.


	3. Chapter 3

**I am hoooooooooooome! I can finally post this! I have only been waiting like 3 days! I will try my best to get another chapter up tonight!**__

David Rossi_'__s Condo.  
Washington D.C.  
January 2, 2002._

Jennifer was happy. No wait, she was more than happy, she was ecstatic. She had managed to finish first in her class at The Academy. First. She was the best student that they had, and now she was determined to share it with the one person in the world she knew it would mean almost as much too. She knew that David would have been proud of her no matter where she had finished, but he had pushed her, and helped her through the twenty one week training program, so she knew he would be extremely proud at where she had finished.

Throwing her black Mercedes into park - a gift David had presented her with on her birthday two months previous, she grabbed her overnight bag, as she exited the car with a pace that surprised even her. She actually felt giddy.

Climbing into the elevator, she ignored the peculiar looks from the doormen. They knew she was dating David, and they were used to seeing her around, so why was she suddenly getting 'the look'? Shaking off her insecurities, Jennifer smiled, soon she would be in David's arms, and she didn't have to leave till the following Monday. She couldn't wait to be able to give him her undivided attention. Lately she had been busy, he had been pushed to a second to her Academy work.

Knocking on his door, she noticed that the welcome mat was missing. It may seem like a trivial thing to anyone else, but she knew just how particular David was about everything being in it's place, and she knew he wouldn't leave it like that on purpose.

Knocking again, she sighed. He had told her that he would be waiting for her, then again, she knew that he had a meeting with his publisher earlier in the day, and he had told her how they always seem to over run. Maybe today was just one of them days.

Shoving her hand into her bag, she dug around for her car keys. David had given her a door key three months ago 'just in case', and although she hadn't yet used it, she decided now was as good a time as any. There was no way that she was going to sit in the hallway until he arrived home. No, it was cold, and see needed heat.

Opening the front door, she had to do a double take. His condo was empty. Walking in, she could feel the tears brimming in her eyes. Where was he? Had he gone? Did he want to leave her? She didn't know what to think. She had thought that they were happy.

Glancing at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, she saw a plain sheet of writing paper. This was it. As she lifted it into her hand, she realised she was shaking. She wasn't a stupid woman. She knew that her fairytale was about to come crashing down around her.

_My dearest Jennifer,_

_I am assuming by now, that you have realised I have gone. I__'__m sorry that I had to do it this way, but I knew if I did it face to face, I would never be able to get the words out. It would be too hard to see the disappointment in your eyes. Please believe me when I say that this is nothing to do with you. It is all me._

_In the last few months you have changed me in more ways than I ever knew could be possible, and a part of me will never be able to thank you enough for that, but another part of me realises that I am still the same bitter old man that you met all those months ago, and I know that you deserve better. I want you to be happy, be happy for me baby. The world is a darker place without that beautiful smile of yours. Please don__'__t lose it._

I will always love you, and the time that we spent together, but now you are heading into a whole new chapter in your life, and I refuse to let you be dragged down by me. You are a intelligent, beautiful woman, and you deserve someone who can show you the world with no hold backs. I don_'__t want to look at the world and our relationship with rose tinted glasses, and I know if I stay at try to tell myself I can change, I would be lying to myself, but worse, I would be lying too you._

Please remember that I never intended to hurt you, and know that no matter how hard it may feel at the moment, it will get better with time. I promise you that. Live the life that you deserve, I know that you have far to go in this world, and remember that no matter how far away from you I am, I will always love you.

You have always, and will always be my beautiful Jennifer. Don_'__t forget that._

Love always,

_David._

Jennifer felt her legs give way under her, as she landed on the floor with a thud. No, this couldn't be happening. Why would he be leaving her? Why now? This had to be some sick joke.

Pulling her phone out of her pocket, she pressed speed dial one and just hoped to hear his familiar voice on the other end. Instead she got the monotone of the automated machine telling her that calls can no long be connected to that number.

He was really gone.

Dragging her knees to her chest, she sat in the foetal position, as she rocked herself backwards and forwards. He was wrong. He could never drag her down. She needed him close to her. _He_ made _her_ feel like a better person. He pushed her to become the person - the agent - she was today, why would he ever doubt that?

She needed him. Now, she needed him more than ever, and he would never know it.


	4. Chapter 4

**I tried to get this typed up for last night, but I was just too tired! Anyway…hmmm! When you read this you **_**may **_**want to kill me. Fear not. It will get better at some point!**

_Jennifer__'__s House.  
January 30, 2002  
Quantico, Virginia._

Settling the last box down on the floor, Jennifer let out a sigh of relief. She was finally moved in. Finally set for 'the new chapter in her life'. Her new chapter in her life without David. How was she supposed to get through that?

Smiling at her best friend, Lauren, she had to grab the table to steady herself as a wave of dizziness took over her. What was going on with her body? Those pesky dizzy spells were becoming more and more often. Couple that with the fatigue that had been taking over her body, she didn't know what was going on. How was she supposed to do her job if she couldn't keep her eyes open.

"Jennifer? Are you okay, honey?" Laurens concerned voice floated over to her, as she rushed to her friends side.

"I'm okay, just a bit dizzy. Just give me a moment." Jennifer reassured, trying to straighten herself up. "I just need some water or something."

"Are you sure? You look really pale, babe. Do you want to sit down for a minute?"

"I am fine. I just want to get unpacked and settled."

"What aren't you telling me, Jen?" Lauren questioned, moving closer.

"It's nothing, Lauren. Please. Don't worry." Jennifer tried to reassure, but she knew the worry was written all over her face.

"Is it to do with David?"

Shuddering at the mention of his name, Jennifer sighed. This wasn't happening. Oh god, please tell her it was a mistake. She couldn't do this. Could she? Sighing again, Jennifer looked at the floor. "I'm late."

"What do you mean you are late? Where are you supposed to be?" Lauren asked, confusion laced in her voice.

"I'm late, late! As in my period!"

"You think you are-" Lauren stuttered, not taking her eyes off her friend.

"I think I might be pregnant. I might be pregnant with David Rossi's baby, and he has left me! He ran away and left me! I can't be pregnant…can I?" Jennifer almost yelled as she paced around her new living room.

"How late are you, sweetheart?" her best friend question, running a comforting hand up and down her arm.

"I don't know…I think maybe ten or eleven days. I don't know. Tell me that this can't be happening? It's just stress, right? With the training and then…then with David leaving me. Please tell me it is just stress."

"I don't know, Jen. You have to take a test or go to the doctor. It could just be stress, but until you go to the doctors you won't know."

"No, no! I cannot go to the doctor. I just can't! I cannot be pregnant! I am starting my job in a couple of days! How am I going to do my job and have a baby! Especially not alone!"

"Okay sweetheart, first I want you to calm down. If you are pregnant, you will find a way of doing this. The FBI will understand. They will be able to give you maternity leave when and if you need it. And you need to understand that you will never be alone. You have your family, and you have me, and if you want, then we will find David together, but until you go to the doctor, you will be playing with ifs and buts and that is no way to live your life. You need to know, and then you can take it from there."

"I can't! If I go, and he tells me I am…then it's real, and if it is real, I can't cope!"

"Jennifer," Lauren started. "You are the most capable and amazing woman that I have ever met. You will be able to do this."

"I don't think I can." Finally letting the tears fall, she collapsed into Lauren's arms. "He told me that he loved me! He promised me that he wouldn't leave me! Now I'm pregnant with his child, and I have no way of contacting him! What am I supposed to do? I know I can't do this without him! A baby deserves a father!"

"Sweetie, let's worry about that when we know we have something to worry about. I'm going to call the doctors surgery and make you an appointment, okay?"

Sniffing, she nodded her head. She had to know. Even though she had been suspecting it for a few days, voicing her concerns had made it real. Now, she had to deal with it.

_Doctor Hilton__'__s Surgery.  
January 31, 2002  
Quantico, Virginia._

Sitting clutching Lauren's hand in hers, Jennifer did her best not to shake. She still couldn't work out why doctors always leave you waiting for so long as they retrieve test results. Do they need the thrill of building the anticipation and worry? Obviously.

Entering the room, the doctor was immediately met by her patient's eager eyes. Settling herself behind the desk, she rested her hands on top of it, and smiled. "The test came back positive. You are pregnant, Jennifer. From what you have told me, if I were going to hazard a guess I would say you were about five weeks along, but the hormones in your blood are extremely high, so there is a chance you are further along than that." Squeezing her eyes shut, Jennifer willed the tears not to fall. Not now. Not in front of the doctor. She knew she had to respond. To speak. But she couldn't so instead she just nodded her head and waiting for the doctor to continue. "I'm going to schedule you for a scan in a few days so we can establish just how far along you are, and I'm going to give you a prescription for some prenatal vitamins. It's important for your baby that you take them. I'll also grab you some leaflets on what to expect. Try to rest and eat healthy and you should be just fine." Standing, the Doctor Hilton once again smiled at her. "Congratulations."

Sitting on the wall outside the doctors surgery, ten minutes later, Jennifer couldn't speak. She could hardly breath. She was pregnant. She was pregnant with a mans child who had run from her. A man who hadn't seen that he was all she could ever need. How was she ever going to explain that to their child?

She knew that she should track him down, tell him about the baby. Their baby. But would she be able to find him? She had heard about the power he had during her time at The Academy, and she knew that if he didn't want to be found, he wouldn't be.

Resting her hand on her stomach, she let the tears fall as Lauren held her. She had to be strong. She had to figure out what she wanted. Sniffing, she sat up straight and took a deep breath. "So I guess this is really happening now…"

Giving her friend a comforting smile, Lauren held her hand. "It is, Jen, but it is still early, you could get a-"

"No! No, don't even say that. I could never do that. That is not an option. But I have no idea how I am going to do this. I'm not ready to do this, Lau. "

"Yes you are. I've seen you with children - you are amazing. This is earlier than you thought it would be, but just think, in a few months, you will have a gorgeous baby that you are going to love more than anything in the world."

"Do you really think I can do this?" Jennifer asked warily. She didn't think she could do this. She wanted children, yes, but later in life. Once she was settled in her career. How was she could to look after a child when she was barely an adult herself?

"Sweetheart, I know that you can do this. But you know, you need to find David. If for nothing else, he should help you financially."

"He left me, Lauren. He didn't want to be with me, so what makes you think he is going to want a child with me?"

"It's his baby, Jennifer. He owes it to both of you."

"I can't." Jennifer whispered, staring out into the road.

"What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to have my baby. _My_ baby. David left me when he promised me he wouldn't. I can't take that risk with a child. I can't let him hurt a innocent child like he hurt me. The day he walked out of my life, he walked out of our child's too. This is my baby. I'm going to do it my way, without him." Turning to face her friend, Jennifer grew serious. "I want you to promise me you won't go looking for him. He can't know! I don't want him to know."

"Jennifer, he has a responsibility."

"_No_! Promise me! I don't want him in my child's life. Please just promise me you won't try to find him." Jennifer pleaded.

"Okay…I promise. I won't try to find him. You can do this your way."

Taking a steadying breath, and pushing herself to her feet, Jennifer let out a breath she hadn't realised she was holding. She was going to be a mom. And being a mom meant protecting her child, which meant, for as long as she lived, she would make sure that David Rossi never found out.


	5. Chapter 5

**Bit of a time jump here between the first half of the story and the second, but this chapter is basically just wrapping up the events of the past…but soon something explosive will be happening for JJ!!! Also, I have set my laptop up now, so hopefully I will have no more problems with uploads like I did last night!!!**

_Doctor Hilton__'__s Surgery.  
February 5 2002  
Quantico, Virginia._

"If you just lay back, we'll get this start. It shouldn't take too long." The doctor instructed as her patient sat uneasily on the bed.

Jennifer nodded, and did as the doctor said. She was actually nervous. Five days ago, she had been utterly terrified of the idea of having a child, but now it all seemed to be falling into place. Her Section Chief at the FBI had agreed that she could shadow the other Communication Liaison until after she had her baby, after which she would be put on active duty, and she had practically been told she could return when she felt ready. Her Section Chief had something about her showing 'immense potential'.

Now, she was actually excited about the prospect of becoming a mother, whether she had to do it alone or not, but what if something was wrong with her baby? She knew that there was no certainty that the baby would be okay until she held it in her arms. The doctor had said the hormone levels in her blood was high. What if that meant something was wrong? What if she lost her baby?

The doctor hadn't spoke. Did that mean she had seen something wrong with her baby? She would have said something to her straight away if everything was okay, wouldn't she? Jennifer wished she had taken Lauren up on her offer to accompany her, but no, she had kept her independent head on and said she needed to do this herself. What was she thinking?

"Is everything okay?" She finally whispered, clutching the side of the bed.

"Well, that depends how you look at it. Everything is fine with the baby."

"Then what is it?" Jennifer asked quickly, her voice a little steadier than it had been a few minutes ago.

Turning the screen to face the expectant mother, she pointed out her findings. "You are expecting twins, Jennifer."

"Excuse me?" Jennifer laughed. "Because I am almost certain that you just said I was pregnant with twins!"

"I did, Jennifer." Pointing them out again, she smiled. It was always a shock when you told someone they were expecting multiples, but she knew the father wasn't around in this case. "It's a shock, I understand. They are fraternal twins, so that means you released two eggs which were then both fertilised. Jennifer, if you're not sure you can handle twins, we can offer you a medical reduction of one of the foetuses."

"You mean, kill one of them?"

"We don't phrase it that way, but yes, we would cut off the blood supply to one of them and-"

"No! I couldn't…I mean…that would be my baby…" Running her hand through her hair, Jennifer pushed herself up, and traced the image on the screen with her finger. "I can't do that to one of them. They are my children, and they deserve the best chance I can give them."

"If it is anything, I think you are going to make an amazing mother, Jennifer."  
"Thank you. Where do I go from here?"

"At the moment, you just carry on as you would in a single pregnancy. Towards the end, you'll have to take it a bit more easy than you would with one, but I don't see why you should have any problems. Just enjoy your pregnancy, and more importantly, don't worry."

_George Washington University Hospital._  
_July 14, 2002  
Washington D.C._

"Okay, Jennifer, I need you to give me a nice, big push. Your children are ready to be born!"

"I can't do it. It hurts too much." Jennifer sighed, flopping back against the bed.

"You can." Lauren stated. "Look how far you have got! They are nearly here! They want to meet their mommy. Don't give up now, Jen."

"It just hurts so much…"

"I know it does, sweetheart." Lauren soothed. "Come on Jen. You've waited too long for them to give up at the last hurdle."

Nodding, she pushed herself back up. "I'm ready."

Ten minutes later, the first sounds of a cry erupted into the hospital as her first child announced their entrance into the world, and to Jennifer, it was the most beautiful sound in the world.

"Well done Jennifer." The doctor smiled. "You've got a healthy baby boy."

"A boy?" Jennifer panted, pushing herself up once again.

"A boy." She confirmed as she passed him over to her for a quick cuddle, before she undertook the task of bringing her son's sibling into the world.

"He's beautiful…" Jennifer cried, running her finger down his soft cheek.

"He is, but, if you give him to the nurse for a minute, we'll meet his little brother or sister."

Taking one last look at him, she hadn't him reluctantly to the nurse, as she brought her second child into. And that she did seven minutes later. Collapsing back into the bed, Jennifer did her best to regulate her breathing. She had actually done it.

"Congratulations, it's a girl." Doctor Hilton smiled, placing the baby into her mother's arms.

"Is she okay?" Jennifer questioned, her eyes never leaving the bundle in her arms.

"Perfectly fine, they both are. You did extremely well."

"Thank you…for everything."

"It was my pleasure."

Turning to Lauren, with a goofy smile on her face, she couldn't stop the tears from coming, but she had no idea why.

Shifting the baby boy in her arms, Lauren wrapped her arm around Jennifer shoulder. "It's okay, sweetheart, let it out."

"David should be here. He should be here checking that they are healthy, with ten fingers and toes, but he left us. Why didn't he want us?"

"I don't know, but you can't dwell on that. You have two beautiful children, Jennifer, and that's all that matters."

"I know, I just wish…"

"I know you do, but it's his loss, he doesn't deserve you. Any of you. Just concentrate on them. Everything will work itself out in the end. Do they have names yet?"

"They do, this, is Chloe Grace, and that, is Joshua David."

Looking at her children, Jennifer finally felt complete. Where he life would take her, she didn't know, but as long as she had her children, she knew she would be able to make it through.


	6. Chapter 6

**I had to change some things here (that actually happened in the show) so it would work in the story - but I think when you read what happens, you won't mind! Got to say - what is up with the site? It does not like me logging in! I might write some more later - I will see how I go! Big thanks to Tracia and Tonni for their constant reviews, they really make it worthwhile to write!**

_Federal Bureau of Investigation.  
March 6, 2007  
Quantico, Virginia._

Jennifer knew what was happening. She had overheard Hotch talking with Strauss earlier in the day, and she knew that this meant she finally had to face her ultimate fear. She could do this, couldn't she? She would do this. Straightening herself up, she exited her officer and made her way do the BAU hallway to the briefing room. There was no point waiting when what as coming was inevitable.

Pausing outside she could hear them. Him. She wasn't any where near ready for this, but there was no where for her to run. If she wasn't in there soon, they would come looking for her.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed the door open. She saw him straight away. He was deep in conversation with Spencer Reid - well, more accurately. Reid was listing things he would like to go through with him, whilst he looked trapped like a deer in the headlights of an oncoming truck. She couldn't help evaluating him. He was still as handsome as she remembered - and she hated him from that.

Slipping into the room, she greeted the team, thankful that Reid still had him occupied so he didn't notice her. She heard Hotch call her name, and she knew what was coming. She would seriously have to think about turning her Glock on her boss.

"JJ, before we get started, there is someone I would like to introduce you too. David Rossi this is-"

"Jennifer." Dave interrupted, at first he had been certain his eyes were deceiving him, but no. It was really her. She was standing in front of her after all this time. His Jennifer. After all this time, she was right in front of him. Staring back at him with those bottomless blue eyes he had always loved.

"You two know each other? How did that happen?" Morgan quipped. He knew David Rossi's reputation, but he had never thought he would be JJ's type.

"Err…yes, we met briefly while I was at college, then once again when I was in The Academy. It's very nice to meet you again Agent Rossi." Smiling at him, she went back to the projection screen. "If you don't mind, we need to start the briefing and get to Texas as soon as possible. This one is going to be bad if we don't move fast."

Taking his seat, David watched from his position at the round table as Jennifer briefed the team. They called her JJ, didn't they? He wasn't sure what to make of that. Jennifer suited her, and to him, she would always be his Jennifer. He wouldn't be able to call her JJ. It just wouldn't come past his lips easily. His beautiful and intelligent Jennifer. If he was honest, he didn't know why he had been so surprised to see her in the BAU. She had always been destined for big things, and he was actually proud she had got them.

He watched the way she interacted with the team, but avoided him like the plague. Could he blame her though? He had hurt her, but now he had to realise that what he did was for the best. Something was different about her, but he couldn't put his finger on it. She had changed some way. Was it just time, or something else? He had a million questions he wanted to ask her, but how was he supposed to do it without raising suspicion? He wanted to take her into his arms and hold her close, but would she let him?

He noticed the rest of the 'team' filling out of the room, leaving just him and her. She was fiddling about with different case files, placed them into a manila box. They were alone though. Was this his chance? "Jennifer-"

"Don't. Don't you dare say my name like nothing has changed. You lost that right five years ago. You walked out on me without even giving me the chance to say goodbye! Without bothering to know what I thought about you theories! How could you do that to me?" JJ almost yelled, before remembering she was in the briefing room. Did he really have to do this here?

"I explained in my letter-" David started, he could see the fury in her eyes.

"Oh a Dear John letter?" She interrupted again. "Oh yes, that made everything better. A couple of paragraphs on a piece of paper really made up for all the time we had spent together. You told me that you loved me! That you would never hurt me, but you went along and did that anyway! I thought that you were different! When everyone was trying to warn me off you, I told them they were wrong, that you could never possibly hurt me, but you just went and threw it all back in my face, so tell me, what are you going to say? Are you going to tell me that you are sorry? That you made a mistake? Come on, David!"

"Jennifer, I did what was right for us at the time. If I had stayed I would have hurt you."

"Hurt me? Do you think that it would be possible to hurt me more than you did? Because I'm telling you, you couldn't! You just left me, David! How was I supposed to deal with that?"

"I thought I was doing what was best." David reasoned.

"Yeah, well you were wrong! You left when I needed you the most! Do you know what that did to me? What you put me through? Everything changed then, and not just because you left me!"

Walking closer her, he resisted the urge to touch her. "What changed?"

Taking a deep breath, JJ closed her eyes as she tried to control her emotion, walking out of the room, she turned briefly, and stated. "I was pregnant." Before leaving completely.


	7. Chapter 7

_Agent Jareau's Office Federal Bureau of Investigation.  
March 6, 2007  
Quantico, Virginia.  
_

Unable to Jennifer's words continued to float through David's head. Pregnant. When he had left, Jennifer had been pregnant. She had been pregnant with his child, and because of his fears, he had let her go through that alone. She had made him a father - the one thing he had always wanted more than anything, but he had missed it, and he couldn't blame anyone but himself.

He wasn't sure how long he stood in the briefing room, but it had been long enough. He had to find her. He had to make her understand that what he had done was for the best, and somehow, he needed to find a way forward, where, if he was lucky, she would let him play some part in their child's life.

Striding through the familiar corridors, he found her office easily. He could see her inside, hunched over her desk, and it almost killed him to know he was the cause of all of her pain.

Knocking lightly on the door, he didn't wait for her to answer before walking in. "Jennifer…"

"Please, David. Just leave me alone. I can't do this right now. I can't deal with you right now. I'm not strong enough to do this any more."

"I can't just walk away. Not now. You said…you said that you were pregnant when I…left…that means…"

"Yes, David. I was pregnant, but I don't see how that is any of your business now. You made your decision before I knew about that, so you don't have to feel guilty."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't have a chance!" JJ yelled, rising from her seat and slamming her office door. She needed to do this semi privately. "You were already gone!"

"Don't you think I deserved to know?" David asked, calmly. Well, as calmly as he could when you suddenly find out you have a child.

"Honestly, no. You didn't then, and you still don't now, and unless you've forgot, you told me not to try and find you."

"I would never have left if I had known, Jen."

"Oh please. Yes you would have, because the high and mighty David Rossi only ever thinks of himself. And either way, who is to say I would have wanted you to stay? A relationship wouldn't work because you stay because of a child!"

"Jennifer, please. It's my child."

"Oh please, don't give me that crap. You know nothing about them!"

"Them?"

"Yes, _them_, David! I have twins." Jennifer spat, pacing her office furiously.

"You mean, we have twins." David offered, immediately regretting it as he saw the anger in her eyes.

"No! I meant what I said!" She yelled, stopping directly in front of him. "_I _have twins. _Me_. They are mine, and that's the end of it."

"They are mine too…"

"No! Just because you donated sperm for their conception does not turn you into a father! You walked out of them when you walked out on me, whether you knew about them or not!"

"Please…"

"Please what? Let you into their lives so you can hurt them like you hurt me? I think not! I am the one who brought them home from the hospital, held them when they were sick and watched them grow. They are my children, and they will only ever be mine. They don't need you, they never have. I won't let you come into their life and then walk out on them a few months later because 'it was best for them'!"

"What do you want me to say? Do you want me to tell you I made a mistake? That I regretted ever moment after I left? Well I did! Leaving you was the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life, and every day I wanted to come back to you, and just hold you. But I couldn't! I knew you would never want me again, so I stayed away! I never meant to hurt you!"

"Then why did you?" Her voice was barely a whisper, but the pain and betray laced in it was clear. Sitting down on the couch she looked defeated and broken. How had he done this to her?

"I honestly thought I was doing what was best. I woke up one morning, and saw you laying there, and I didn't know what I had done to deserve you, and I didn't want to drag you down into the dark place I always seemed to find myself in some way or another. I love you too much for that."

"I loved you too, David. That was always going to be enough for me. I knew the scars you have, and I didn't care. I wanted every part of you…I don't think I can ever forgive you for what you put me through. For ages I wondered why I wasn't good enough for you."

"It wasn't you not being good enough for me. I wasn't good enough for you, Jen. I need you to understand that."

"I can't." Standing up, she pulled a photo frame off her desk, and handed it to him. "Their names are Joshua and Chloe. They'll be five in July. They are the most amazing, well adjusted, smart and funny children I have ever met in my life. Every day they amaze me with something new."

Looking intently at the photo of two small children covered head to toe in sand, David thought his heart was going to explode. They were his children, and just looking at their faces, he felt like he knew them. "They are beautiful, Jennifer."

"They are."

"Can I…can I see them?"

Closing her eyes, JJ bit her bottom lip. This is why she had wanted to avoid this situation since the day she found out she was pregnant. Shaking her head, she met his eyes. "I can't."

"What?" David's voice was shocked. He had just found out about his children, and now she was going to snatch them away from him again.

"I can't let you hurt them."

"Jennifer, they are my children too. Please. Please just let me see them. I can't not when I know they are out there."

"I'm sorry, David. The answer is no."


	8. Chapter 8

**This is for Tracia! Enjoy it honey, and thank you for your constant support! Feels like I'm on a roll today - god knows how - I only have three hours sleep last night!!!**

_Room 349, Days Inn Hotel.  
March 6, 2007  
Carrollton, Texas.  
_

David alone in his room, whilst the rest of the team met for dinner. He couldn't bear to go with them. He wasn't one of them, and he couldn't sit there all evening and watch the pain on Jennifer's face. Especially since he knew he was the cause.

His mind fell to them children. To his children. Would he ever get to know them? To hold them? To tell them how he had fallen in love with them instantly? All he wanted to do was hold them in his arms and tell them how sorry he was for not being there for them.

But she wouldn't let him.

Was it a punishment? Was that why she had refused to let him in their lives? But then, even if it was, could he really blame her after what he did to her? Deep down, he knew that he deserved this. She was right, she couldn't open her, their children up to that kind of pain, but it didn't make it any easier.

They were almost five. Joshua and Chloe. Did they wonder why all their friends had daddy's but they didn't? Did they wonder if he loved them? Did they hate him for abandoning them? He didn't doubt that they knew they were loved, but was that enough? Did Chloe have someone to kiss away boo boos? Who had taught Joshua to play football? What kind of a father could he actually be to them? He didn't even know their actual birthday. What their favourite colours were. Their favourite foods. Maybe Jennifer was right.

Sitting in the silence, something finally occurred to him. Maybe there was someone else in their lives doing all the things a daddy did. He had noticed that Jennifer didn't wear a ring, but that didn't mean anything.

Was his family already someone else's?

Would they ever really be his?

Had he lost the best thing that ever happened to him before even knowing about it?

Would he ever get to take Jennifer into his arms again, and make love to her like they used to?

No, he was destined to spend the rest of his life alone, and bitter, and for that, he had no one to blame but himself.

_Room 350, Days Inn Hotel.  
March 6, 2007  
Carrollton, Texas._

Jennifer laid silently in her dark hotel room. She didn't want to be here. Not now. All she wanted to do was hold her babies, and never let them go. How was she supposed to cope with David's sudden reappearance? She had always told herself that if he did happen to find out about the children, he wouldn't want anything to do with them, but now, he was across the hall from her, and he had told her of his desire to be in their lives. But she had shot him down.

Picking up her cell phone, she dialled the number of the one person who would help her make sense of the whole thing.

"Hello?" The chirpy voice on the other end of the line answered.

"Hey Lauren, it's Jen." JJ smiled to herself, she could hear Joshua and Chloe in the background.

"Hey sweetheart. Josh, Chloe! Mommy's on the phone."

As the cell phone was set to speaker phone, JJ could feel the tension draining out of her body, as her children told her about their day's adventures. Would they ever know how great they made her feel? After telling them just how much she loved them, she instructed them to pass the phone back to Miss Lauren. "Lauren, I need your advice."

"Of course. Shoot. Go ahead."

"I've seen David."

"You've seen David?" Lauren echoed.

"Well, actually, he is in the room across the hall from me as we speak. I told him about the twins. God, Lauren, this is so messed up."

"Okay, sweetheart, start from the beginning. Where did you see him?" Lauren asked carefully, sensing her fragile mood.

"Work, he's back on the team. Everything just came back to the surface and we got into a bit of an argument. I ended up telling him about the twins. I didn't even really mean to, but it just came out before I could stop it, then I stormed off. I'm such a fool."

"What did he say about the kids?"

"Not too much, I think he was in shock really. He…he wanted to see them, but I said no." JJ whispered as the tears started to fall.

"Oh, sweetheart, why did you say that?"

"I was angry. I didn't even mean too, I just couldn't let him in when I have spent so much time trying to heal the wounds he caused."

"You still love him." Lauren stated. It wasn't a question, it was a forgone conclusion.

"I didn't think I did, but seeing him there, everything I felt those years ago came flooding back to me. What am I going to do?"

"You need to talk to him, Jen. You need to open yourself up again."

"What if he hurts me, again? But worse, what if he hurts Joshua and Chloe? I could pull myself back from it, no matter how hard it feels, I could, but if he hurt them, it would be so much harder."

"I know it would, but you don't know that he will. Sometimes you have to take a risk to gain something good. Answer me this truthfully, do you want him to be in your life?"

"I do, but-"

"No, buts Jennifer. You can't live your life that way. Just take it slow. Even if you just tell him that you are willing to give him a chance, it doesn't mean you have to introduce him to Joshua and Chloe tomorrow. Just get to know him again, and build the trust up slowly. Make him earn your trust, and prove to you what his intention are."

"What if the twins don't like him?"

"They'll adjust, they are great kids, you know that they will. You are just clutching at straws."

"I know you are right, I'm just-"

"Scared." Lauren interrupted. "That's okay. You're allowed to be scared, but you can't stop yourself for going after something because you are scared."

"I know. I know." Sighing, JJ rubbed her forehead. "I'll talk to him in the morning."

"No you won't, go and talk to him right now. If you leave it till the morning, you'll chicken out."

"But-"

"I said no buts. Go. I'll see you when you get home. Goodnight, Jen."

"Night…"

Sighing, she pushed herself of the bed. "It's now or never."


	9. Chapter 9

_Room 349, Days Inn Hotel.  
March 6, 2007  
Carrollton, Texas._

David heard the faint, constant knocking on his hotel room door. Glancing at the clock, he groaned. It was gone eleven, who in their right mind would be knocking on his door at this time of night? All he wanted to do was wallow in a pit of self pity, and beat himself up over the choices he had made with his life, but no, the knocking would not stop.

Pushing himself off the bed, he strode across the room, before unlocking the door. He had to take a double look when he saw who was standing there, as he pinched himself to make sure that he was still awake. "Jennifer."

Looking him up and down, she bit the inside of her cheek as she took in his dressed down, rumpled appearance. She had always loved him like that. Sexy…handsome…no! JJ mentally scolded herself. She needed to keep on the one train of thought. She wouldn't be able to do this if she let her mind wander onto other subjects. "I think we need to talk - again. A calm, rational and adult conversation."

Nodding his head, he let her into the room. Something was different about her. She was more relaxed. Was she coming around? Did he dare let himself believe that maybe she was going to let him in. She was still beautiful in his eyes though, and even if she had come here to once again, tell him she wanted him to stay away, he would never stop trying. "Of course, take a seat."

Sitting down, she gave him a weak smile. "I'm sorry for snapping earlier."

"You had every right to snap, Jennifer. I did something that was inexcusable, and I didn't exactly explain myself in the best way. I think I would have been worried if you hadn't reacted that way, especially this morning, and I am sorry that I didn't have a chance to warn you. I didn't know you worked on the team."

"It's okay. I knew already that you would be there today. I overheard Hotch and Strauss talking about you, but that's all in the past now, David and now, I think we have to start to concentrate on the future. On our children."

"You mean…you mean, I can see them?" David whispered, almost expecting her to snatch it back again.

"I mean, that I am willing to give you a chance. You must realise that I have to take this slow. So that I know you won't hurt them before I let you into their lives permanently. I have to think about them, and what is best for them, because at the end of the day, they are the ones that stand to get hurt in this if you suddenly change your mind."

"I can understand that, Jennifer. I could never ask for anymore than for you to give me a chance." David declared, his voice unwavering. It was the truth, and he would never be able to thank her for giving him a second chance.

"If you can prove to me that I can trust you, and you can show me that you actually want to be in their lives for the long run, then I will let you meet them, but you have to understand from the word go, that Josh and Chloe control the shots. If they aren't comfortable straight away, then we have to take it slower. We go at their pace. We do it in places that they feel safe in, and until they are comfortable with you, I am there at all times."

"Whatever conditions you want to put on this, I will agree to. Whatever you want me to do to show you that I am really in this, I will do. What made you change your mind?"

"Lauren. Do you remember her?" When he nodded, she continued. "I called her a little while ago, and she made me open eyes, and made me realise that if I stop them from getting to know you, it is only them I am taking from. I have always tried to convince myself that they didn't really need a father, and that I was doing a good enough job for both of them, but in reality, they do, and they are starting school this year, I don't want them to feel different from their class mates because of our stupidity."

"My stupidity. I threw you, the best thing that had ever happened to me, away."

"It's our stupidity, Dave. I could have ignored what you said in your letter when I found out I was pregnant, but, keeping them from you, was like my revenge for hurting me, and that was childish of me, and I cost you time with our children. You miss precious moments that you will never get back, and I am sorry for that."

"You have nothing to apologise for, Jen. Like you said, it's all in the past now, and it's from here that matters now."

Smiling, she could hear the sincerity in his voice. "Is there anything you want to know about them?"

"Just about everything, and anything that you could tell me."

"They were born on July 14 of 2002, they were three weeks early, but the doctor said they were the healthiest twins she had ever delivered, and they left the hospital with me two days later. They are the greatest kids. They are happy and constantly smiling. Chloe is a complete and utter girly girl and she loves and thing and everything pink. She does ballet and gymnastics. She is so kind, but she is feisty at the same time. She always knows what she wants, and she will always get it. She is beyond determined, and was walking by ten months. She has a bigger sweet tooth than Emily if that is even possible, and she has the best sense of humour. Joshua…he is my Prince. He's kind, gentle and laid back, he didn't sit up until he was seven months old, and not because he couldn't do it, just because he couldn't be bothered. He loves each and every sport, and he is extremely protective of his little sister. Some days he will do something, and he will remind me so much of you. He just gets this look in his eyes, and I just see you."

"They sound amazing, Jennifer."

"They are."

"Does the rest of the team know?"

"They know about the twins, of course, but they don't know they are yours. It's never come up before."

"I can understand that."

Taking a couple of photos out of her pocket, JJ handed them to him. "I thought that you might like some photos of them."

Looking at the photos, he didn't even bother to try and hide the grin that formed on his face. They were his children, and he was damn well going to be proud of them. "Can I keep them?"

"Of course. I've got plenty at home. I just always carry them on cases to remind myself why I do this." Standing up, she smiled as she watched him take in everything about the photographs. "If you don't have anymore questions, I'm going to head to bed. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a long day."

Watching her walk to the door, something suddenly popped into his head. "Jennifer?" Waiting till she turned around, he couldn't help thinking how she looked exactly the same as she did the first day he laid eyes on her. "Do you mind if I don't call you JJ? You'll always be Jennifer to me."

Chuckling, she smirked. "I think I can handle that David."

**And now, I am heading to bed! Goodnight people!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Whoops! I actually started writing this a couple of hours ago, but it is actually a nice day out, and I got a little distracted by the sun! Yes, SUN!!!!! I might be able to write some more tonight, but I'm not promising anything because I'm stupidly busy today. Anyway, here we are!**__

David Rossi's Office Federal Bureau of Investigation.  
April 20, 2007  
Quantico, Virginia.

JJ stood outside David Rossi's office. Pacing. Was she ready for this? Not so much, but they had a deal, and she wasn't about to break it now. He had kept his side of the bargain, and had been extremely patient with her. No, he deserved this.

Knocking on the door, she waited for him to tell her to come in before opening. Her smile immediately grew when she saw him. She was still in pain over what happened between them, but she didn't let it affect how she saw him anymore. In a weird way, she finally understood why he had done it. And maybe, just maybe, it had turned out for the best.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of a visit?" David grinned at, making JJ go weak at the knees. How did he still have this kind of effect on her?

"I just had a question for you…"

"Intriguing, go on."

"What are you doing tomorrow?"

"Well, you know, I do have a jam packed social life." David joked. "I'm not doing anything tomorrow."

"Good, I thought…maybe…we could…" JJ mumbled. She talked for a living, but now she was a babbling idiot? Score one Jareau!

"Jen, you need to talk in full sentences if you want me to understand what you are trying to say. I don't bite, just spit it out."

"I'm taking Josh and Chloe to the zoo tomorrow, they have been begging me for ages, but this is the first free time I have had in what feels like forever. Anyway, I thought you might like to join us…"

"Are you serious?" David questioned, his voice laced with shock. He had wanted this for ages but now he was petrified.

"I am. I think, no, I know I can trust you with them, David. And even if I didn't before I do now."

"Why is that?"

"I heard you talking to that Agent from Cyber Crime, the one who was flirting?" David nodded. He knew who she meant, he hadn't been able to shake her off. "I heard you turn her down, and say you couldn't because you had to concentrate and put your children first. You haven't even met them, and I would never have kept them from you simply because you went on a date, and yet you didn't."

"I don't want any distractions. They are my sole focus now, Jennifer."

"Exactly, and that's why I knew you wouldn't intentionally hurt them, if you want to join us tomorrow, you are more then welcome."

"I would love too."

Smiling, JJ stood. "If you come to mine for nine tomorrow, we'll take my car, it'll just be easier."

"Will the children be okay with me coming?"

"They will. I told them that one of my friends might be coming with us. I didn't want to confuse them by saying you were-"

"No," he interrupted. "I totally understand. Their pace, remember?"

"I do. I'll see you tomorrow."

David watched as JJ walked out of his office. His weekend alone, cooped up in his study going over monotonous consults, suddenly looked a lot brighter, and suddenly, he couldn't wait.

_Jennifer's House  
April 20, 2007  
Alexandria, Virginia._

Opening the front door, JJ couldn't help but laugh, standing there was the legendary David Rossi holding two very large stuffed animals and gift bags. "David, you didn't have to bring anything."

"It's just a small gift for them. I have missed four birthdays and Christmases, it's the least I could do."

"Well, I know better than to argue with you. Come in, they are in the kitchen finishing their breakfast." Looking back at his pale face, she turned back to him and offered him a comforting smile. "You don't have to be nervous, Dave, they won't bite."

"I never expected to be nervous. I've never been very good with children."

"Don't be ridiculous! I've seen you with the kids on cases, you are great with them, and this is different. The bond will be there, you just have to find it, but come on, last time I left them in the kitchen alone I came back to the Great Flour Disaster."

Walking into the kitchen, David subconsciously held his breath as he laid his eyes on his children for the first time. They were busy eating and chattering away to each other that they didn't even notice them come through. But Dave was mesmerised by them. He didn't dare look away out of the fear they would suddenly disappear. His children were even more beautiful than in the pictures.

"Josh, Chloe, remember I told you someone was coming to the zoo with us? Well this is David, mommy's friend."

Somehow, David managed to shake off his shock by the end of JJ's sentence, and he regained his ability to talk. "Hello Josh, Hello Chloe."

"Hello!" Josh quipped before shovelling another spoonful of cereal into his mouth, but Chloe just stared. Measuring him up head to toe, much like her mother had done all those years ago, before she broke out the Jareau grin which he was sure would break dozens of hearts when she was older.

"Hiya!" Chloe grinned. "Mommy said we'll see seals!"

"I'm sure that we will." David replied, placing the gifts on the table.

"I like seals!" Chloe squealed, holding her arms out to David.

Seeing JJ nod out of the corner of his eyes, David carefully lifted Chloe off her seat, and held her in his arms like he had been doing it forever. It just felt so right, holding her close and feeling her even breathing on his neck. "So do I sweetheart, so do I."

He just knew then. No matter what else happened in his life, he would remember the moment that he finally felt whole, and he knew, he would never be able to cause those two miracles any pain. He would rather kill himself first.


	11. Chapter 11

**I was going to write the day at the Zoo, and actually started too, but it all got a bit repetitive, so I thought I would skip that and get to the good stuff! I had a bit of a made day with hospital appointments so this is a bit (well…a lot!) late but here it is! Sorry it is so short!  
**_  
Jennifer__'__s House.  
April 21, 2007  
Alexandria, Virginia._

As he walked into Jennifer house later that night carrying his sleeping son, no one was more surprised than David himself, at how easy it had been to make the transition from a single, carefree man who only had to look out for himself, to the caring and loving father, who had two children under the age of five.

What surprised, or maybe scared him more than that, was the fact he wouldn't change it for anything. He didn't need countless nights of drinking, with some random blonde. Now the only blondes he would ever want to be around again were already in his company.

"Where do you want me to put him, Jen?" Dave whispered, smiling at Josh's sleeping form.

"Do you might carrying him upstairs? You can just lay him on his bed, I'll get him changed after I've done Chloe."

"I can change him if you want." He offered without any conscious permission from his brain.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, I mean, how hard can it be."

"You would be surprised. His room is the second on the left, and his pyjamas should be on the end of his bed. Don't worry about his teeth for tonight. I think they are both too far gone for that."

"Okay." Leaning over, he pressed a tender kiss onto Chloe's forehead. "Good night princess."

Smiling, JJ carried her daughter to her bedroom. David Rossi was definitely showing promise with the children, and unfortunately, she could feel herself falling for him again.

Could she go there again? Yes, he was doing a great job at learning to be a father, but a father and a lover was a great jump and it opened a whole new chapter which could take their concentration away from their main concern.

What if they went back to 'that'. Became a 'them' again, and it didn't work. Would he run again, and leave their children? She wanted to be able to take the risk. To be able to say, to hell with it, and just follow her heart, but this time, there was so much more to lose.

***

Carefully pouring two glasses of wine, she handed David one as he walked into the kitchen. "They had a really good time today, David."

"So did I. They are amazing children, Jennifer. Even more than I thought they would be."

JJ smiled, taking a sip of her wine. "Well, you were lucky. You got them on a good day. If either of them had woke up in a mood, then today could have been extremely different."

"Maybe, but they would still be amazing kids though. Did we really make them?" David questioned, smirking around his wine glass.

"Unless they sent me home from the hospital with the wrong set of twins, yes we did." Laughing slightly, JJ took in David's relaxed manner. He looked like he belonged. "I find it hard to believe sometimes. You know, that they actually came from me. Us. I just watch them daily, and wonder how they could be so wonderful."

"Wonderful, and rather good with their interrogation skills."

"What do you mean?" JJ raised her eyebrows as she questioned him. What on earth had those two conscientious four year olds said.

"When you went to get the food during lunch, Josh and Chloe wanted to know what my intentions with their mommy was." David chuckled, draining the last of his wine.

"Oh dear Lord! What did they say?"

"Just normal questions that a child of their age would ask, but." Moving his body closer to hers, he successfully pinned her between the kitchen counter and himself as he ran his hands down her side until they rested on her hips. "Chloe asked me a really important question."

Gulping, she could feel the blood rushing to her ears. "And what would that be?"

"Well, she asked me if I wanted to kiss her mommy."

Feeling the heat rush through her body, JJ didn't know what was happened. "And what did you say?"

Moving his body the slightest bit further, David slowly bent his head forward, closing the last inches between them, as he sealed his lips to


	12. Chapter 12

**I'm not sure if I like this chapter. I think to me it seems a bit repetitive, but it kind of needed to be said again so I don't really know! Argh! Haha. I have already decided what JJ is going to do, so… *Whistles* but anyway, here is today's chapter!**

_Jennifer's House  
April 21, 2007  
Alexandria, Virginia._

Pulling back sharply, JJ stared into David's dark eyes. Being in his arms felt right. He made her feel complete when he held her in his arms. But this was no longer about her. "David…"

"Shh. Don't. You can't tell me that you don't want this." David reasoned, running his fingers through her hair, feeling his hope rise as she shivered to his touch.

"What I want and what I do are two very different things, David. This is no longer about me. This isn't about you. It's about our children."

"And you don't think that we can be together while giving our children the attention and love that they need?"

"It's not a risk I can take, David. You have to understand that."

"Well, sorry, I don't." Pulling back slightly, David ran his hand over his face. "Jen, we were good together. I was an idiot for not seeing just how good together we were back then, but now, you are standing right in front of me, and I am not going to let you go again."

"We have changed, David. It's not just about us anymore. It will never just be the two of us again."

"Good."

"David-"

"No, Jennifer, listen to me. Yes, we have two beautiful children who have to be put first, but you can't keep using them as an excuse as to why you can't be in a relationship. Being happy is not, will not, and has never been detrimental to Joshua and Chloe. I get that you are scared, but I'm not going to hurt any of your."

"But what if us doesn't work, Dave? We have a good thing going at the moment, but if we try for more, and it's all a disaster, it's me who is going to have to pick up the pieces. At the end of the day, if anything goes wrong, or you don't like the way things are turning out, you can walk away. Me? I'll have to hold my children as they cry and tell them, that no you do really love them. I can't do that, David, I jus can't."

"You won't have too."

"How can you be so sure? How can you say that in six months or a year, you won't be sick of the runny noses and lack of adventure? The lack of young women in your bed?"

"I just can be. Listen to me, listen to me very carefully. Just because I wouldn't be free and single, does not mean I would not be having an adventure. I'd be having the best adventure out there. I would have you, I would have Joshua, and I would have Chloe. I don't want another nameless woman, I want you, just like I always have."

Subconsciously moving into his warm embrace, JJ rested her head on his chest. "I just can't cope with getting hurt again, David."

"I won't hurt you, baby. I promise you that."

Meeting his dark gaze again, JJ swallowed and nodded her head. "I don't know if I can give you a certain answer right now, David. It's been a long day, a long month, and everything is so up in the air-"

"Just tell me there is hope. Just tell me that one day, I might be lucky enough to again say you are mine."

"There is hope, I just need time. I need to work out what this - us, means for the twins, for me, for work."

"Sweetheart, as long as I know I stand a chance, you can take all the time in the world, but I can't promise that I won't do everything within my power to convince you that we are good together during that time."

"I was never denying we were good together. We are, and the past month, I have really enjoyed your company, but I need to figure out if I am willing to risk that, on something that is uncertain."

"I love you, that is certain."

"Is love enough?" JJ questioned, she just wanted to sit, to sleep and to try and get her head into some sort of order. Her heart wanted everything she did, but unfortunately, her head ruled her.

"No, it's not, but it is a good start. I know it's a risk, and that you run from any situations that could hurt you, but there is so much more to gain here. Our children could grow up with their mother and father around constantly. We could give them everything they could ever need."

"I just need…I need to be alone."

"I understand." Kissing her head, he collected his things. "Josh told me his soccer team had a game tomorrow…can I…"

Nodding, JJ smiled. "You're more than welcome to come. No matter what comes of us, I won't stop you from seeing the children. They thrived under your influence today. I've never seen Josh be so confident around new people. The match is at ten, we normally go out for lunch afterwards."

"Come to Little Creek. I'll cook."

"I don't know…"

"Just for lunch, I won't push anything else. It would be great for the kids, they can run around, and go off exploring. Please."

"Okay." Smiling, she walked him to the front door. "I'll see you tomorrow."

JJ watched him drive off, and then she simply stared into the silence of her street. Since when did he life become so out of control?

Collapsing into bed ten minutes later, she couldn't settle. She had promised herself long ago, that no matter what happened, she would never take David back, but now, she knew she was only a few seconds away from saying yes.

She knew he wouldn't hurt the children. She had seen something in his eyes today, and although she couldn't put her finger on what it was, she knew that he would always be there for the twins, so what was her problem? Was she just clutching at straws?

Could she open herself up to him?

Could she let him love her again?

Could she take the risk?


	13. Chapter 13

**Okay, so I kind of decided that the clearing up would still be sitting there (unfortunately) after I wrong another chapter. There's no real plan for this chapter, so I have no idea where it will end! After this…I will tidy *Sobs* my place kind of looks like a bomb has gone off…oops!**

_BAU Briefing Room.  
May 2 2007.  
Quantico, Virginia._

Jennifer didn't care. She didn't wait for an invitation. She needed him, and she needed him now. She didn't care if Reid had suddenly broke the case, and she knocked the idea out of his mind. This was important. And as soon as David's eyes met hers, he knew it too.

The voices and ideas immediately stopped, as each member of the team turned to face her, as the tears streamed down her cheeks. Each member descending on her, as looks of concern filled their faces, but they were soon replaced with looks of surprised, when, instead of seeking comfort in two of her closes friends, JJ turned directly to David.

"Jennifer? What's wrong, sweetheart?" David soothed, wrapping her into his arms.

"It's Chloe."

Staggering back, David hoped to God he had heard her wrong. "What's wrong with Chloe?"

"I don't know. Oh god, I need to get to her. I have to go-"

"No, you need to talk down first." Grabbing her shoulders her sat her in a chair, before kneeling in front of her, while the team looked on speechless. "What happened?"

"The preschool called about an hour ago…they said that she wasn't feeling well, and that they would call if she got any worse and needed picking up. They just call back…they had to call an ambulance. She wasn't breathing Dave! I need to get to her! I need to get to my baby, David! What if she-"

"Do not even think about finishing that sentence. Chloe is strong like her mom, and she will be just fine. Garcia, can you get Jennifer's stuff?"

"Eh…of course, Sir." Garcia stuttered, before rushing out of the room, closely followed by Morgan.

"Dave, what's going on?" Hotch questioned, stepping forward.

"Not now! I'm going to the hospital with Jennifer, you lot can work on the profile with out us."

Looking into the eyes of the person who used to be his mentor, he knew. "They are yours, aren't they?"

"Yes, but-"

"Just go. You two need to get to the hospital as fast as possible. Call us and let us know what is happening, we will get there as fast as possible."

_George Washington University Hospital.  
May 2 2007._

_Washington D.C._

David stood next to his daughter's sleeping body, as he willed her to fight. He couldn't lose her when he had only just found her. Neither him or JJ has spoke since they left Quantico, but for him, the events of the last two hours had just solidified what he already knew. He couldn't lose any of them.

Taking Jennifer's hand in his, he gave it a comforting squeeze before pulling her body closer to his. "She's okay to be okay."

"You don't know that David. We don't even know what is wrong with her."

"We just have to believe she is going to be okay."

"But what if-"

"No what if's. I lost you all because of a what if. I'm so sorry. To all of your. I've tried to tell myself that I left just to protect you, but I don't think that is the truth. While it is true, it was about me too. For once, my life was looking good, and you brought me out of the bad place, and I thought it was just too good for me. I was scared."

"Scared? Of what?"

"Of everything. You. What we had." Seeing the hurt in her eyes, David back tracked. "That came out wrong. I was scared that you were going to realise that you could do much better, and leave, and I knew I wouldn't ever be able to recover from that, because to me, you were, are like a drug. I was scared that if I let you into every little part of my life, I would never be able to function again when you left,, that I wouldn't be able to do my job when I knew there was something so amazing and loving out there, so like an idiot, I ran. I ran away from the best thing I have ever had in my life, and in the process, I threw away everything I didn't know I had always wanted." Pausing for a moment, he brushed her hair out of her eyes, before looking at Chloe. "I've always wanted children, did you know that?"

"No." Her voice was barely a whisper.

"Always, but after three marriages and no children, I just assumed that there was no way I could have children, and I knew how much you wanted to have them at some point. You wanted the perfect family, and I wanted you to be able to find someone who could give you that. But without knowing it, everything I wanted was right in front of me, but because it was too hard to say the words, I ran."

"I should have told you about them." She whispered again. She had never imagined he would have gone through all of this.

"No, sweetheart, you did what you thought was right, and at that point in my life, it probably was the right decision to make."

"Why didn't you tell me all this in your letter?"

"As long as I didn't say it aloud, I could keep fooling myself into believing all of it was just for your benefit. God, Jen. Every day I woke up wishing I was holding you in my arms. Every time I saw you give a press conference or happened to read your name somewhere, I wanted to come back, and beg for forgiveness, but I couldn't do it."

"Why not?"

"Because you deserve better, and you're right, so do Chloe and Joshua."

"All I ever wanted was you. I wouldn't have been with you in the first place if I didn't see the man you didn't know you were."

"But what if I can't be him?"

"David, you are him. The only person who doesn't know that, is you."

"I could never ask you to forgive me, you have already given me so much by letting me be in their lives." Brushing the tear out of her eyes, he made her look at him. "I'm so sorry, so sorry that I ever hurt you. I know I can never make up for it, but I will do everything in my power to make it better."

"You already have." Leaning in, JJ sealed her lips to his, as she slowly felt the hurt and uncertainty fade from her body. He hadn't just left her, he needed to leave her - to find himself.


	14. Chapter 14

**This chapter took me a while to write - I get distracted waaaaaaay too easily! Damn you sun! Damn you! Haha. But here's this one. I'm also working on the next chapter of **_**It's A Wonderful Life**_**! P.S. I am out practically all day tomorrow so I might not be able to update till latish. If I get some time this evening, I will do another update for today!**

_George Washington University Hospital.  
May 2 2007._

_Washington D.C._

Pulling back, David stared into her bottomless blue eyes, before kissing her forehead and moving so she was tucked into his arms. They didn't need to speak at the moment. "Jen?"

"Don't. Nothing else needs to be said, I understand why, and it's not important anymore. I want to be with you, but I still need to take this slow. I need to figure out what you being in my life will mean for Josh and Chloe. They still just think you are my friend, and I can't confuse them, but I want us to be a family. I just have to figure out how that will work."

"We can worry about that later. Right now, all you need to do is concentrate on Chloe, and getting her better."

"What if she doesn't get better, Dave?"

"She will. She's part of the family we have together, and she will be for many, many years to come."

"I can't lose her."

"You won't lose her."

"You won't." David stated, full of confidence. His little girl wasn't going anywhere.

"What are we going to tell the team? They aren't stupid…"

"We will just tell them the truth."

"What about fraternization?"

"Well, technically, you weren't in the FBI when this started, so we should be okay on that, and frankly, I don't care what they think. All I care about if them."

JJ was about to respond when she heard the faintest whimper coming from the small child on the bed. Jumping out of David's arms, she was by her side. "Shh, it's okay princess. Mommy's here. Everything is going to be okay now."

As Chloe's doctor entered the room, David took his position by Jennifer's side. Taking a quick look at the pulse monitor, the doctor smiled at JJ. "Try not to look so worried, she is going to be just fine. All of her tests came back negative, except for her blood test which showed a trace of an infection."

"An infection?" JJ stuttered, in shock. "All of this was because of an infection?"

"Unfortunately, yes. Sometimes when a child gets sick, their body just gives up to be able to fight the infection, which can cause them to get dehydrated and make things seem a lot worse than they are. The good thing though, is, infections are relatively easy to treat. I'd like to keep her in overnight to give her IV fluids and antibiotics, but she should be okay to go home by tomorrow."

Moving forward, David shook the Doctors hand. "Thank you."

"It's not problem. I'll come to check on her later."

Cuddling into David, JJ finally relaxed. "She's going to be okay."

_Jennifer's House  
May 16 2007._

_Alexandria, Virginia_

Both Jennifer and David had avoided each and every member of the team like the plague for the past two weeks. Neither of them were ready for the questions, but as of two this afternoon, they wouldn't be able to avoid any of them. With Chloe given the all clear, they had decided to invite the team over to Jennifer's house for a barbecue, and of course, an interrogation.

Upon arrival, Emily and Garcia dragged JJ off into the kitchen to begin. JJ tried to escape, but with these two on her trail, David could only wonder if this was the last time he would see her alive.

"Okay." Garcia started. Pointing her finger directly at JJ. "Get talking, missy, and get talking fast!"

"I don't know what you are talking about." JJ said, innocently.

"Oh I don't think so. You know exactly what she is talking about!" Emily argued, making JJ look at he. "You and Rossi?"

"What about us?" JJ smiled. She wasn't going to give in easily.

"Don't play the innocent." Garcia laughed. "You and Rossi got down and dirty, Gum Drop, and what we want to know, is why were are only hearing about it, now?"

"It was a long time ago."

"What happened?" Emily questioned, sitting down at the breakfast bar.

"I was in my final year of college and Dave was there promoting his new book. We met and the rest was history."

"I don't think so, Baby girl! Do you think we are going to buy that's all that happened! The way you ran to him when Chloe was brought into hospital. I mean, he took time off to help you with her! Unless…wait…oh my god!"

"Are they?" Emily muttered, looking at JJ. Her profiler instincts were on high alert.

"Yes." Closing her eyes, JJ wished she was anywhere but here. "Yes, Joshua and Chloe are David's, and-."

"And? He just left you when you were pregnant?" Garcia almost yelled as her anger rose.

"He didn't leave me when I was pregnant, so to speak." Looking from each of her friends faces, she knew there was no escaping this. If she didn't tell them what had happened, then it was highly likely they were going to take their anger at his hurt of their friend on David, but if she did tell them, what would they think of her? What would they think of her? She hadn't told him he was going to be a father. She had kept their children away from him for five years. Would they look at her differently now? Would they think of her differently now? Taking a deep breath, she looked out into the garden to where David was playing with the twins, before looking back at her friends. The perfect family that she had always wanted, and that included everyone on the team too. Taking a deep breath, she looked them in the eyes. "I didn't tell David I was pregnant."


	15. Chapter 15

**I was going to try to get this up last night, wasn't I? Oops. I got completely distracted last night, I moved into a new apartment recently and we are still getting everything organised so this had to get pushed to the end of the list, unfortunately! But here we go. Some concerned friends…maybe a bit more later. **

_Jennifer's House.  
May 16 2007  
Alexandria, Virginia._

"You didn't tell him you were pregnant?" Emily finally spoke, breaking the uneasy tension.

"It's complicated Em. Until he came back to the BAU I hadn't seen or heard from him in over five years. Our break up wasn't exactly amicable, and I had no way of contacting him…but no. I didn't tell him I was pregnant, and up until about two months ago he didn't know the twins even existed."

"So you went through it all on your own?" Garcia questioned.

"You already know that I have done this on my own."

"So, let me get this straight." Garcia started as she paced. She was still angry. "He walked out on you - left you, just as you found out you were pregnant, and you did this on your own, now, after all these years, you are willing to just let him back into yours, and your children's lives without question? Come on Jayje! Do you really think with the influence that David Rossi has at the FBI he had no idea you were pregnant? What if he hurts you, and them?"

"I do believe him. Look, Pen, I appreciate your concern, but I've seen him with the children, he is good with them, and they enjoy his company. He knows that if I even suspect he might cause them any pain, he is out of their lives, but, so far, he has done everything to make sure that doesn't happen. He is letting us go at our pace, not his."

Looking out of the kitchen window, Emily smiled as she mused. "He definitely does look good with them."

"He is. He goes to Josh's soccer matches, he stands and watches Chloe's ballet classes, he reads them stories, calls them up just to ask them how their day was, and I know that he loves them. He did hurt me before, but look what we got out of it. I would never change anything that has happened because then I wouldn't have my children, but I understand why things ended how they did now. I do still worry that maybe, he might change his mind, but I can't let it rule my life, and he wasn't the only one at fault. I should have told him about them, if not for him, then for them. We are working out, and I would appreciate it if you gave him a break, Pen."

Rolling her eyes, Garcia sighed. "Fine, fine, fine! But I believe, if we ever have reason to revisit this subject, you have to listen to us."

"Okay." JJ nodded.

"And what about the two of you?" Garcia questioned again. "I've seen you two getting cosy."

"We are just seeing where it goes. We both want the same thing, but there is no certainty on that, I just know that when I am with him, I feel safe, and secure. Maybe I shouldn't, but I do, and I am happy with that."

"Good." Emily grinned. "And now the important stuff. Is he as good as the stories say?"

_Meanwhile, outside…_

"Rossi, man, we need to have a talk." Morgan order, walking over to where David was tying Josh's sneakers.

"Okay…what about?" Standing Josh back down, he straightened up.

"JJ. Now, I know she has brothers, but they aren't close here, so I feel like this is my place. She's strong, intelligent and extremely capable, but I swear, if you ever hurt her, or one of those children, I will need to break every bone in your body."

"I understand."

"I mean it, man. One hair on any of their heads, every out of place and it will not be a happy Morgan day. You get me?"

"I get you Morgan. I don't plan to hurt them."

Seeing the sincerity in his eyes, Morgan smiled. "Got to have been a bit of a surprise, eh? Suddenly having two kids. Makes me think about what I might have out there…"

"It was a surprise, but a very welcomed one. They have made me appreciate life in a different way."

"Bit of a big change though? You have to think about them. No more going out to get girls…"

"Since Jennifer, there has never been another girl. It was always her I wanted, and thanks to a weird turn of events, I might have a second chance."

"Does she know that?"

"That there has been no one since her? No. She doesn't need to."

"So what is it like then, being a dad?"

"Weirdly satisfying. Chloe brought me a drawing home she did at school, nothing amazing, but still amazing in it's own way, and it's better than any piece of art I have ever owned."

"That's good."

"MR DAVID!" Chloe yelled from her position at the back door.

"Duty calls." Running over to his son, David smiled and scooped him up. "What is it monster?"

"Mommy wants you!"

So maybe the confrontations hadn't been as hard as they thought it would be, but in the coming days, they both knew they had a conversation that was going to be a lot hard. They weren't trying to kid themselves, they knew that it was never going to be easy, because, at the end of the day, how do you explain to two almost five year olds that mommy's new friend was actually their long lost father?


	16. Chapter 16

**Sorry. I really did intend to put this up last night. But I got a bit distracted - whoops but anyway, here it is, and I am going to try and get the next chapter of It's A Wonderful Life up tonight. I've just got to finish typing it.**

_Jennifer's House.  
May 18 2007  
Alexandria, Virginia._

Pacing the dining room, Jennifer wasn't sure if this was a good idea. Did it have to be now? Was she ready for this? After this, he was a permanent fixture in their lives. She knew it was the right thing to do, but if she was completely honest, she didn't know if she was ready to share her children. What if they preferred him? Would she lose them? She didn't have to question whether he would intentionally take them away from her - she knew he would never try to take them away from her. But what about unintentionally? Children always wanted the newest thing - did that go for parents too?

Walking to the front door when she heard the bell ring, she could feel the nerves bubbling to the surface, but she was more than surprised when she saw David staring back at her with a similar look of nerves and dread. Giving him a forced smile she opened the door fully. "Hey…come in. You look as bad as I feel, Dave."

"I just…what if they take it bad, Jen?"

"Then we will cope. I don't think they will. They already love you, and this will just be a bonus for them."

"What if they think I abandoned them?" David asked, his voice laced with fear.

"They won't."

"How do you know?"

Running her hand through her hair, JJ stared through to the living room where the children were watching cartoons. "Last year, they went to a friends birthday party. It was on father's day. When they came home, they asked me why they didn't have a daddy to give cards and presents to. I told them they did. They didn't understand why you weren't here for them to be able to do that. I told them that you wanted to be, but you were making the world a better place for them to grow up in. The next day I heard them telling their friends how great their daddy was." Pausing, she took Dave's hand in hers. "I don't think it's them that we have to worry about, is it? It's not them who are having problems getting this whole situation straight in their heads. It's us. And instead of doing the sensible thing, like, talking to each other, we are keeping it bottled away. Isn't that what got us in this situation in the first place?"

"I'm worried that you are going to realise I can't be what they need, and take them away from me."

"And I'm worried they are going to prefer you, and I'm going to lose them."

"Jen that will never happen."

"My brain knows that, but my heart, not so much. But it's the same for you. I wouldn't have let you in their lives just to take them away from you. You have already been what they need. All they need is for you to love them.

"I do love them. So much it hurts sometimes."

"I know that, David. I can see it in the way you look at them."

"I also have a big soft spot for their mom."

"Mmm." Pressing her body against David's, and let their lips meet as she drew him into a slow, passionate kiss. "Well then it's probably a good thing she has a soft spot for you too then. Come on, we can't put this off any longer, or it will just be harder."

Once the television was turned off, and David and JJ had sat themselves on the coffee table in front of the twins, they could both feel their hearts beating ridiculously fast. David squeezed JJ's hand reassuringly. He wanted to help her, but he knew this was hers to explain. "Josh, Chloe, Mommy has something very important to tell you, and I need you to listen to me very carefully, and I promise you, I will answer any questions you want to ask. Do you remember when I told you that Daddy couldn't be here." When both of them nodded, she gave Dave a quick smile before turning back to them. "Well, now, they don't need Daddy to help them all the time, and he can come back to us. I know that you don't understand everything, but I just want you to remember how much I told you that your Daddy loved you." Smiling at David once more she took a deep breath. "David isn't just Mommy's friend from work. David is your Daddy."

Looking him up and down, Josh moved and stood next to David. "You my daddy?"

"Yes, I am, Joshua."

"Does you love us?" Chloe asked, edging closer to JJ.

"Very much so, Chloe. I always have." He wanted to reach out and hold her in his arms, but he could tell she wasn't ready.

"Does we have to live with you? I likes my bedroom!" Chloe cried her eyes filling with tears.

"No, Chloe." David explained. "Nothing is going to change. You live here with Mommy and that is never going to change. I just want to spend some time with you, do you think that would be okay?"

Looking at JJ, Chloe nodded. "I thinks so."

"Is you and Mommy married?" Joshua asked innocently causing JJ to choke on her orange juice, while David simply smiled.

"No, Josh, we're not. Why do you ask?"

"Taylor said his mommy said you has to be married!" Josh explained.

"Mommy's and daddy's don't have to be." JJ reasoned.

"But maybe in the future…" David added, but only loud enough for JJ to hear, causing her to smile.

"Can we play now?"

"Of course, go out into the garden. I'll make some dinner in a minute." Once they were gone, JJ turned to David. "That went okay, didn't it?"

"I think it did. Chloe's behaviour seemed like she was a bit more nervous and apprehensive about it than Josh, but I think they took it well. We are lucky with them."

"We really are. I wouldn't change anything about them for the world."

"Me neither."

"Do you want to stay for dinner tonight?"

"I don't want to impose…"

"You're not, Dave. I wouldn't have asked if you were. It will be good for the kids, and I'd like you to stay with us. With me."

"In that case then, there is no where in the world I would prefer to be."


	17. Chapter 17

**Okay, so I didn't know if I would actually get to write this tonight, but I just managed to crack my head on the corner of the cabinet in the kitchen, so that means no sleepy for me for a while, so I might as well just write, hey? Can't say doing it with a pounding headache is easy, but what the hell, eh? I haven't decided if anything is going to come from this chapter (once you have read, you will see what I mean.) but let me know what you think. RATED M**

_Jennifer's House.  
May 18 2007  
Alexandria, Virginia._

Later that evening, David held JJ close, as they sat on her couch, sipping wine and reminiscing about things that they had gone through together. He still found it hard to believe he was getting a second chance, even as he held her in his arms. And he knew just how lucky he was. Second chances didn't come often.

"What are you thinking about?" JJ asked suddenly, piercing the comfortable silence of the room.

"Just how lucky I am. How lucky I am to get a second chance with you. I keep thinking that maybe it's not real."

"Mmm." Moving so she straddled his legs, she pressed kisses along the length of neck. "Then let me convince you of just how real it is."

As she pushed the kisses deeper, and harder, Dave felt all the memories of her body returning. But now he wanted to make new ones. It had been too long. Much too long. But were they rushing? Did she really want this? "Jen…"

"Shh. I want this. Please don't try to talk me out of it."

"Never."

Dipping his hands under her shirt, David let his fingers caress her soft skin. She hadn't changed. Not one bit. Her body was exactly how he remembered. Even after a pregnancy with twins. He wouldn't care though if she had changed, because for the first time a relationship for him was more than just about what is on the outside.

Lifting her tank top over her head, he tasted her skin for the first time in what felt like forever. "God, Jen." Gently palming her breasts through the satin of her bra, her moaned in unison with her. "You have the most amazing body."

"You've seen it before…"

"It's been too long. Too long Jen."

"You could have anyone-"

"No, Jen." Trailing his hands behind her, he unhooked her bra. "It's only been you. There has been no one else."

"Wait." Pulling back slightly, she looked at him in complete shock. "You mean, you haven't…"

"Not since you. I have never wanted anyone but you."

"God." Shifting off his lap, she undid his jeans and with a little help from him, she removed them and his boxers. "I think for that, you deserve a reward."

Taking him into her mouth, she smiled around him as she heard him groan her name. She knew what he liked. Carefully she drew her hand up to the base of his manhood and squeezed.

David tried not to thrust his body upwards, but with the little minx causing havoc on his senses he didn't know how much longer he could last. But he didn't want it to happen like that. "Jen."

"Mmm hmm?" Bringing her bright blue eyes up to him, she grinned innocently. "Can I help you? Although, I thought I was already doing that."

"I want to be inside you. I need to be inside you."

Smirking, she rose, quickly stripped out of her jeans and straddled him again. "Oh you do, do you?"

"Mmm hmm. Please baby. Please don't make me wait longer."

"But you know that they say that good things come to those who wait."

"Jen, I can't wait. It's been far too long."

"Do you have a condom?"

"God…I…" Groaning, David threw his head backwards, deflated. "No."

Sighing, Jennifer knew they had two options. Risk it. Or stop. The problem was, she didn't think she could stop now. She wasn't on the pill, so it would be a big risk, but, eventually, she reasoned that it was worth it.

Quickly positioning herself over his straining manhood, she could see the shock in his eyes. "I need this, Dave."

"Are you sure?"

"I am certain, sure and everything that makes me want to do this."

Nodding his head, he pulled her into a passionate kiss before thrusting his body up, sliding into her heat with no trouble. God she felt good. Exactly how he remembered, but it still felt like the first time.

Dropping his hands to her hips, they easily fell into the rhythm they had established all those years ago, that brought them so much pleasure.

"Harder, Dave! Please! Harder!"

Groaning, David thrust harder, while one of his hands left her hips and found the small bundle of nerves he knew would eventually push her over the edge. "God, baby. You're so tight. So wet. So good!"

Her climax creped up on her before she knew it. Tensing her body around him, she threw her head backwards as she screamed his name.

Holding all of her wait, David painfully tried to hold off his own release. "Jen…shall I pull out?"

Shaking her head, JJ regained enough composure to grind her body into his. "Just let go."

Letting himself go completely, he felt him spill his all into her body, as he held her on his sweaty chest, panting and trying to regulate his breathing. Before long, he felt JJ start to press kisses up his neck till their mouths met. "God, Jennifer. That was amazing."

"It was." Cuddling into his chest, she smiled up at him. "I don't think it has ever been so intense."

"I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"Not at all. I can't say I won't be sore tomorrow…but it will be worth it."

"What if anything comes of this little event?" David asked, as he rubbed soothing circles on her back.

"Then we will deal with it."

Kissing her nose, he carefully extracted himself from her embrace. "I should probably get going…"

"Don't. Stay with me tonight. Please."

"As long as you are sure."

"I am." Standing, she quickly pulled her underwear on and lead him up to her bedroom. This was just the start of something amazing.


	18. Chapter 18

**I have a really bad headache from where I whacked my head last night, so this isn't as long as I was aiming for, but anyway, here we go. Enjoy!**

_Jennifer's House.  
May 19 2007  
Alexandria, Virginia._

As she woke the next morning, JJ smiled as she felt two strong arms around her waist restricting her movements. David was the warmth next to her body. He hadn't left her. Pressing light kisses onto his lips, she smiled as he slowly began to wake. "I thought when I opened my eyes, it will of have been a dream and you would have been gone."

Pulling her into a fierce kiss almost immediately, David growled. "I think you will find it was all real. I'll prove it to you again if I need too."

Smirking, she pushed him away slightly. "As amazing as that sounds, unfortunately, in about five minutes we'll have two year hyper children making their way into this room. And as it's Saturday they will be expecting their pancakes before the soccer game and dance practise."

"Family life, eh?" Grinning, David got himself out of bed and pulled on some clothes, while JJ simply stared back at him. Were they already a family? Turning back to her, David suddenly felt the concern bubbling to the surface. Was something wrong? Crossing the room in two strides he knelt beside her on the bed. "Jen? Are you okay?"

"Yeah…eh. I'll be fine." JJ stuttered, trying to force a smile.

"Baby, tell me what's wrong."

"It's just…are we really a family already?"

"Of course we are." Rising from the floor, he sat on the bed and pulled her across his lap. "We are the family that we should have been all those years ago."

"I know, sometimes it just feels like this is all going so fast."

"It's not though. Not really. It's just continuing from what we already had."

"I know, I really do."

Smiling, David kissed her. Everything was falling into place, and soon she would be his forever. He finally had everything he wanted, and he was not willing to let it go.

_Ardeo Restaurant.  
June 9 2007._

_Washington D.C._

As David sat in the upscale Washington D.C. restaurant, he shifted nervously in his seat. He didn't know why he was so nervous. Well he did, he just did know how to shift the nerves, and unfortunately, for him JJ was starting to pick up on this, and he could feel the mood of the night slipping.

Did she think he was getting ready to leave her? That was the last thing he wanted her to believe, and he hoped to god she wasn't. That was the furthest thing from the truth. "Jen? Sweetheart, are you okay?"  
David asked, slipping his hand under the table and running it along her thigh.

"I'm okay. Just thinking." She couldn't take her eyes off of him. Was history repeating itself? Maybe. Only this time he was trying to let her down gently so he could still be a part of their children's life. She thought that they had been doing well. Joshua and Chloe had both fully accepted David in their lives as their father, and she had finally let herself be loved again. But know? Was it all about to be thrown back in her face.

Okay, so she would just have told him if it was that, but she hadn't opened up. She'd barely ate anything, and she hadn't touched her wine. He had to do this now, before she ran completely. "Sweetheart, I don't know why you think I brought you here tonight, but I am almost certain that it's not what you are thinking."

"You're going to end-"

"No!" David interrupted, taking both of her hands in hers. "No, Jennifer. I am not, and will not, end this. I'm sorry if I gave you that impression sweetheart, but I promise you, that is not why we are here." Opening his jacket pocket, he placed something on the table. "Just over five years ago, I was walking through Georgetown when I saw that. I bought it straight away, and I carried it around with me for weeks, trying to find the perfect moment to give it to you, but before I could, I got scared, and we both know how that turned out. Then one day, I turn up at the Federal building after all that time, and I see that beautiful face that I love so much, and I was lucky enough to get a second chance. The day we got back after that first case, I went home and got this out of my safe, and since then I have been carrying it around again. I found you once, and when I got you back, I was determined that I was never going to let you go again." Dropping to his knee in front of her, he brushed away her tears as the other occupants of the restaurant stared on. "We have two beautiful children, and we are a family already, and this would just be the icing on the cake." Picking the ring box up from the table, he smiled at her. "Jennifer, will you marry me?"


	19. Chapter 19

**I managed to get this typed up, but I couldn't get the It's A Wonderful Life chapter done. When I hurt my head, I also aggravated an old injury in my shoulder so it is difficult to type, hopefully it'll settle down in a couple of days, and I will be able to get all the stuff typed.**

_Ardeo Restaurant.  
June 9 2007._

_Washington D.C._

"Excuse me?" JJ stuttered, her eyes never leaving the two carat platinum ring in front of her eyes, as well as the man who was holding it.

Smiling, David brushed her long blonde hair out of her eyes, before repeating his words slowly and clearly. "I said, will you marry me?"

"I…" For once in her life, Jennifer Jareau was totally and utterly speechless. "I don't know what to say." Blinking back the tears, JJ tried to keep her emotions calm.

"Oh…Jen-" David muttered nervously.

"Yes." She finally whispered.

"Pardon?" It was David who stuttered this time, holding her hands tight in his, not wanting to let go in case it was all a dream.

"Yes! Yes, yes, yes! Of course I will marry you!" JJ cried as she pulled David into a bruising kiss.

"Oh thank god." David held her close, he didn't care that they were currently sat in the middle of a busy restaurant. He hadn't lost her after all. "You had me worried for a minute then."

"My answer would never have been anything but yes."

"I know, but, it's a mans prerogative to worry."

"You have done this three times before and you were still worried?" JJ laughed nervously.

"I may have done this three times before, but this is the only one I have wanted so much it hurts. I love you so much that it hurts."

"I love you too, David.

_Potomac River.  
June 9 2007._

_Washington D.C._

As the newly engaged couple walked hand in hand along the Potomac River, David could tell that there was something still wrong with the mood. Yes, JJ seemed ecstatic about the engagement, but she was still holding back. Had he done something wrong? He always thought that he was a good profiler, but this one woman, the one woman who he wished he could read better than anyone, had him stumped.

Stopping so they were looking across the water, David wrapped his arms around her. "Baby, what is wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong, David. Why would something be wrong? Tonight was perfect."

"Sweetheart, I read behaviour for a reason, so don't give me that crap, and most of all, I know you. I know when there is something bothering you. Tell me what it is."

"David, I promise, nothing is bothering me."

"You barely touched your food, baby. I know when there is something up."

"It's just…"

"It's just what, honey? You know that you can tell me anything."

"I'm late, David." JJ finally said, her eyes staring straight ahead.

"Late? Late for what? It's gone eleven, Jen. What could you possibly be late for?"

"Not that kind of late, David…" JJ explained.

"Then what…wait…do you mean?"

"Yes, I mean my period is late, David." JJ sighed, running her hand through her hair. Although she had said they would deal with anything that happened, she was still petrified.

"Oh, god, Jen. How late are you?"

"Five days." JJ simply stated, as she unconsciously shifted closer to David's body heat. He hadn't ran from her, so that must have been a good sign.

"Has this happened before?" David asked, rubbing circles on her back.

"Only once. When I was pregnant with the twins."

"Oh, do you think you are pregnant, sweetheart?" David questioned, kissing her head.

"I don't know, David. I've been to scared to go to the doctor or to do a test."

"Why are you scared, baby?"

"I don't know. I'm just scared that-"

"If you are pregnant, I am going to leave you." David finished her sentence for her, spinning her around and forcing her to look at him. "Sweetheart, if you are pregnant, I wouldn't leave you."

"I know, but-"

Kissing her head, David smiled. "Sweetheart, if you are pregnant, I am not going to leave. If you are pregnant, it is going to be the most amazing thing in the world."

"But it's so fast, David." JJ whispered as the tears began to fall. She didn't know why she was crying, she just couldn't stop herself.

"Hey, hey. Don't cry. Listen to me, Jennifer. If you are pregnant, it is going to be something amazing, and there is no reason to be scared. Maybe it is fast, but really, so were the twins, weren't they? And we both know that neither of us would change them."

"But-"

"There are no buts, sweetheart."

"Sorry." JJ muttered, looking at the ground.

"For what?"

"For over reacting. For ruining tonight."

"You didn't over react sweetheart, and you most definitely didn't ruin tonight. It's been perfect."

"I need to know, David."

"Need to know what?"

"If I am pregnant. I can't sleep tonight without knowing."

"Of course, sweetheart. There's a twenty four hour pharmacy up the street. Let's head back to the car, and I'll stop there on the way back."

"Thank you, David."

"No, thank you."

_Jennifer's House.  
June 10 2007._

_Washington D.C._

Neither JJ or David had said anything since they arrived back at her house. The children were staying with Emily for the night, so it meant they were alone.

David had let JJ deal with her thoughts alone, while he tried to deal with his. He wouldn't admit this till her until she told him what she wanted, but he hoped she was pregnant. He wanted her to be pregnant more than anything. He wanted to experience every kick, every pain. He wanted to watch their family grow.

"I'm…I'm going to go and do this upstairs." JJ's voice cut through his thoughts.

"Of course. Do you want me to come up?"

"It's okay, I'll bring it down once I've…maybe you could make some drinks?"

"Anything you want." Kissing her head, David went to the kitchen while she climbed the stairs.

The next five minutes were the longest of both of their lives, as they once again slipped into silence. When the alarm finally sounded, neither of them moved for what seemed like hours. Eventually, after taking one last deep breath, JJ stood, picking the test up off the counter, before turning to David.

"David, it's…"


	20. Chapter 20

_Jennifer's House.  
June 10 2007._

_Washington D.C._

David stared at Jennifer, trying to guess the result by the body language she was giving off, but so far, he was getting nothing. Did that mean it wasn't the answer she hoped for? God he hoped it was what he hoped for.

Rising from the couch, David took both her hands in his, and forced her to look at it. "Baby, what does it say?"

With tears in her eyes, JJ turned her head to face David. "It's positive, David. I'm…we're…we are going to have a baby David."

"Oh my god!" Pulling JJ into a crushing kiss, he pressed kisses around the exposed skin of her face. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure David. Well, as sure as you can be on a home pregnancy test, but you are more likely to get a false negative than false positive."

"Oh my god."

Smiling, JJ laughed. "You said that."

"Sorry, just…wow." Releasing her from his iron clad grip, he rested his hand on her still flat stomach. "Our baby is in there."

JJ gently caressed his face. This was a side of David Rossi she had never seen before. Were there tears in his eyes? "Yes, it is."

"Sorry…you must think I'm ridiculous." David muttered, seeing the surprise in her eyes.

"What? No, of course not. I think you're cute."

"Cute?" David laughed. "I've been called a lot of things in my time, but cute is not one of them." Leading her to the couch, he pulled her down onto his lap. "Are you okay with this, Jen?"

Snuggling into his body, JJ sighed happily. "I am."

"But?"

"No but…okay, maybe a little teeny tiny, but. I am happy, I mean, it is a baby. Our baby, but, this is going to change everything."

"Change doesn't have to be a bad thing, Jennifer."

"I know, I just have to get my head around everything. But please, don't think I'm not happy about this."

"I don't sweetheart, and now, I think we should go to bed, after all, we do have the baby to think about now."

"Dave, honey, the baby is the size of a pea!"

"And that means we can't start to look after it already? Come on, bed, and in the morning, I'll make you breakfast."

"Dave you don't-"

"No arguing. Didn't I tell you the first time we met not to argue with me because I always win?"

"Maybe…"

"Well then. I'm going to look after you both for the next few months. No questions asked."

"David-"

"Jennifer. I wasn't here with the twins, I couldn't help you through it, and this time I want too. Please let me. Now come on, bed."

"I'm sorry, David. I didn't even think about that…"

"It's okay. No dwelling. Look to the future, but your immediate future is bed, and sleep."

Smirking, JJ pulled his body down over hers as she laid back against the bed. "While bed sounds good, I have a much better use for it…"

_Jennifer's House.  
June 10 2007._

_Washington D.C._

David stayed true to his word, and brought JJ breakfast in bed the next morning, however, he wasn't planning on it being shoved back in his face as she bolted out of the bedroom. Following her he immediately began to rub soothing circles on her lower back, as he held her hair away from her face. When he was sure she was done, he gently pulled her into his arms, as he reigned kisses along her face. "Jen?"

His voice was concerned, for a moment, JJ wanted to hit him. He did not have to worry about every little thing. Then she remembered. This was his first time. "It's okay, Dave. It's just morning sickness. I'll be fine in a bit."

"Jen, that was more than morning sickness! You could barely stand."

"David, it was exactly the same as it was with the twins."

"You don't think…" David's voice trailed off.

"I don't think what?" JJ questioned, shifting on the bed to face him while she tried to force down a piece of toast.

"You don't think there is more than one in there?"

Choking on her toast, JJ coughed before placing it back on the plate. "I doubt it David, I mean…what are the chances that would happen?" She laughed.

"Actually, sweetheart, I believe that once you have had one set of twins, it is more likely to have another."

"Pardon?"

Sighing, David tried to fight back a chuckle. She must know this. "Sweetheart, the twins are fraternal, that means your could have another set."

"No! No, that can't be right!" Opening up her laptop, JJ quickly typed in a few questions, and stared back in shock, as the results told her there, it black and white, that yes, you were more likely to have twins if you already had a set. "Oh my god. It's twins! I know it! It's all your fault!"

"Actually, it's the mother's side…" David saw the error he had made straight away, as he saw the fury in her eyes.

"No, mister! I'm the one who is pregnant again, with twins! If I say it is your fault then it is your fault!"

"Sweetheart, calm down. You don't even know if you are."

"Oh yes I do. I do because it is just my lucky! No, I couldn't just have a nice, simple, easy pregnancy where I could just relax and enjoy it! No, it'll be twins! Two sets of twins, David! How will we do that?"

"Calm down. We will make an appointment with the doctor and we'll see if they can do an ultrasound early, okay?"

"Okay, I'm calm, but I swear to god, you better hope it's not twins Dave, or after this, we are never having sex again!"

David looked at his future wife and knew that she meant it. Was being pregnant with twins really that bad? He had no idea, but he had a sinking suspicion he was going to find out.


	21. Chapter 21

**Firstly, I should say that I don't know if I will be able to keep updating this regularly. I got some bad news today, and it's thrown me into a bit of a tail spin. I will try to keep updating every day, but it will just depend on the circumstances of life offline.**

_Doctor Hilton's Surgery.  
June 11 2007._

_Quantico, Virginia._

Walking into her office, Doctor Hilton smiled, and spoke in the happy sing song way, doctors always did when they knew they were retreating behind their desk and not getting prodded and poked. "Jennifer, how wonderful to see you. How are you? The twins? They must be getting big now."

Smiling, JJ squeezed David's hand. "They are good. Both growing like weeds at the moment. They like getting themselves into all sorts of trouble."

"They must be starting school soon?" The doctor enquired as she pulled JJ's not up onto her computer screen.

"In September. They can't wait, me? I could push it back a year…or twenty."

Laughing, the doctor turned to face her. "Of course. I was the same with mine. But anyway, what can I do for you today?"

"I think…no, I know I'm pregnant. I took a home pregnancy test and it was a clear positive."

"Ah right. Well, if you just hop up onto the bed, we'll run a quick ultrasound and check, shall we?"

Giving David's hand one last squeeze, JJ hopped up onto the bed, unbuttoning the bottom half of her shirt as she went. "I've been having really bad sickness too like…last time. And you known, I am kind of utterly terrified it could be twins again."

"I see, just lay back and we'll take a look." Switching the machine on, the doctor squirted the gel onto JJ's stomach, before moving the probe around. "Well," Doctor Hilton smiled "Mother's intuition is definitely correct."

"You mean…there is two?" JJ stuttered, staring from the screen, to the doctor and finally to David.

"I do, indeed. They both look like they are growing well, and they are both in good positions."

"You mean, there is two?" JJ stuttered again.

Smiling, the doctor moved the screen around, and pointed each baby out to the parents. "Yes, Jennifer. There are two babies. I know it's a shock, once again, but there are definitely two in there."

"Oh my god." JJ gasped. "I can't have twins - again!"

"If you don't think you can do this again, I can offer you the same options has before…"

"No." Pulled herself together as she shook her head. "I couldn't do that then, and I can't do it now." Looking at Dave, she took a deep breath, before speaking to him. "I guess we will be having two babies then."

"We are. It'll be okay sweetheart." Kissing her head, David stared at the screen. "That's out babies, Jen." David whispered breathlessly.

"It is." JJ smiled, maybe everything would be okay.

_Georgetown Diner.  
June 11 2007.  
Washington D.C.  
_  
Two hours later, JJ and David sat in a small booth of the Georgetown diner. Since leaving the doctor's surgery, they had slipped into a comfortable silence. They had been told both of the babies were healthy and growing well, and that JJ was in perfect condition.

JJ watched as David stared intently as the grainy ultrasound photo. JJ could feel her heart beating rapidly in her chest. Could she really go through this, when she had two children at home that needed her? Taking a deep breath, she shook her head. She could, and would do this. She had managed to do this before, alone. This time she had David beside her, every step of the way

"It's just amazing, Jen." David finally whispered, huskily, as his eyes watered. "I know you're scared, but-"

"I'm not scared, Dave. Not anymore at least. I won't lie, I was terrified, I mean, it's four children from two pregnancies, but I was petrified when I found out about Josh and Chloe, and now, I wouldn't imagine my life without them, and I know it will be the same this time. I just need you to understand, this isn't going to be easy. I had high blood pressure when I was pregnant with Josh and Chloe, so-"

"Jen, we'll do whatever it takes to keep all three of you healthy. Everything will be okay, and in eight months we will have four beautiful, healthy children."

"We will." Looking at the scan, JJ smiled. "We're going to have to decide what we are going to tell the team. If we tell them I'm pregnant, then tell them we're engaged, they will automatically think it's because of the baby."

"Does it matter what they think?"

"No, it doesn't matter what they think, I just don't want them to think it."

"Jen, they won't think that."

"Please. I know that they won't to our face, but-" JJ explained, getting more and more worked up as she went.

"Okay, baby. We won't tell them about them both straight away. Which first?"

"The engagement. It's not safe to say about the pregnancy until twelve weeks."

"Whatever you want. We do this your way, baby."

"What did I do to deserve you?"

"I think the operative question, is what did I do to deserve you. All of you. How do you think Josh and Chloe will take this?"

"Quite honestly, I don't know. I think they are going to find it hard. They had me, all to themselves for four and a half years. Then you came into our lives, and they adapted well to having to share my time and attention, but I think that's because they knew that you weren't a threat, but this is different. A baby - well two, will be totally dependent on us, and I think for a while we will be dealing with some jealousy issues."

"We'll deal with them as and when they come up. We will do something special before the babies arrive to make them feel special."

"You're too good to us." JJ murmured as she snuggled into David's chest. The tiredness that pregnancy brought suddenly catching up on her.

"No, sweetheart, you are much too good for me."


	22. Chapter 22

**From now, it will sort of be continuous, so the times and places, don't matter. Sorry for not updating yesterday, but like I said, life too over, and I kind of just needed a day away to evaluate things. Can I just say thank you to everyone who is reading and reviewing this - especially Tracia for the constant support. It means, so, so much to me. RATED M.  
**  
Later in the evening, David lay with JJ's body close to his, as he gently caressed her stomach, trying to identify some sort of sign that his children were inside. "I still can't believe they are in there, even after seeing them on the screen. It's amazing, Jen."

JJ smiled, leaning up to press a kiss into his neck, this was still all new to him. "It takes a while to get your head around, but once they are moving, it will seem more real, but now…now we have more pressing matters to see to."

Moving so she was straddling his hips, JJ ran her hand down his chest as she gently assaulted his neck. Feeling his body tense under hers, JJ pulled back, only to find a look of utter worry painted across David's face. "Baby, what's wrong?"

"This doesn't feel right, Jen." David muttered, hoping not to hurt her feelings.

Straightening her back, JJ stared directly at him. "What do you mean this doesn't feel right? To me, this feels perfectly right."

"The twins, Jen."

"What about the twins? They are down the hall, fast asleep. Knowing they were here has never stopped you before. Hate to break it to you, but they are always going to be here. It's a little late to get a complex about it now."

"I don't mean Josh and Chloe. I mean," Laying his hand on her still flat stomach, he smiled. "them. I will not risk hurting them. Or you."

"Dave, you are not going to hurt them, or me. Trust me when I saw you won't even be close."

"What if-" David started to argue, only to be quietened by JJ's finger to his lips.

"No, listen. Everyone and their best friends have sex while they are pregnant, and trust me, you want to take advantage of me now, because in a few months, I will not be in the mood for you."

"Jennifer, are you sure it won't hurt you or the babies?"

"I am certain, however, if you don't kiss me soon, _you_ will be in a lot of pain."

"Well in that case…" Flipping them over on the bed, Dave began to trail kisses along the column of her neck. "If it hurts, at any point, just say the word and we will stop."

"I trust that you are not going to hurt me."

Pulling her tank top over her head, he could feel his arousal growing as he took in the changes in her body that pregnancy was already bringing. "God, baby. You are beautiful. No, you are more than beautiful, you are exquisite and down right sexy." Dropping his head slightly, he took one swollen peak into the wet heat of his mouth. Kissing and nipping her gently. If nothing else, this was one area he knew she was already extremely sensitive in.

Running her hands down his body, JJ quickly rid him of his shirt, before turning her attention to her zipper of his pants. She needed him inside her, and she needed him inside her now. "Dave, stop teasing."

"I'm not teasing, I'm playing." Dipping his hands into her pyjama pants, he teased the hot, sensitive flesh as JJ writhed beneath him. "I thought you enjoyed this."

"Dave, my hormones are all over the place. I need you, and I need you now." Thrusting her hips upwards, JJ smirked to herself as she was rewarded with a low moan from the man who had sent her hormones crazy in the first place.

"You are a demanding little thing aren't you?" David smirking ridding both of them of their pants.

"You bet your ass I am." JJ grinned as she dragged his head closer to her, and brought their lips together, as their tongues duelled for dominance.

Breaking the kiss, David positioned his body above Jennifer's. "This is going to be slow, and soft."

Thrusting his hips down, he gently joined her body to hers, groaning her name as the sensations overwhelmed him.

"God! Dave!" Wrapping her legs around his hips, all JJ could do was moan as he went deeper than he ever had before. "Faster! Please!"

"Jen…" David groaned. He wanted to. He wanted to give her what she wanted, but he couldn't help but worry.

"You won't hurt me! Please David!" JJ all but cried. Did he know what he was doing to her.

Thrusting faster, he could feel the pleasure growing as JJ raised her hips to meet his persistent thrusts. "Jen! Oh god! Jennifer!" Running his hand down her clammy body, he found the small bundle of nerves at the heart of her femininity that he knew would bring her to her ultimate release.

Screaming his name as JJ was claimed by her climax, she held onto David as he followed her over the edge.

Holding her close, David rained kisses along her face, as they both came down, and regulated their breathing. "Did I hurt you, baby?"

Raising her eyes, to meet his, she smiled and shook her head. "Not at all. You could never hurt me, David. I'm pregnant, I'm not fragile. I won't break."

"I know, I just want to make sure that everything is how it should be. I want to know that all of you are getting the best you can."

Reading what he wasn't saying, JJ ran her hand down his face. "You don't have to try and make up for not being here when I was pregnant with Joshua and Chloe. That's not how this works, David."

"I can't help it, Jen. I missed so much because of my own stupidity."

"You can't beat yourself up over it, David. You're here now, and that's all that matters. You are here when they need you. They are here when all of us need you."

"God, I love you."

"I love you too. We all love you."


	23. Chapter 23

**I only had three hours sleep last night (*Head hit's the keyboard*) so there is a high chance that this chapter won't make the most sense ever! Bear with me. I will try to get back to regular updates. I hate not being up to date!**

Three weeks later, David watched as JJ rushed around the Chicago bullpen, and went into yet another private meeting with Hotch. Something was going on, and because JJ hadn't told him what it was, he knew it wasn't going to be good. And with blonde haired blue eye women going missing, Dave wasn't sure just how much worse it could get.

Cornering her as she grab a drink, he decided it was all cards on the table time. "Do you care to tell me what is going on, Jen, or do I have to figure it out for myself?"

"Nothing is going on, Dave. Why would you think that it is?" JJ voice sounded harsh, yes, she was definitely hiding something.

"Jennifer, I'm not stupid. You have been in secret meetings with Hotch, and then there is the fact that you have been avoiding me all morning."

"David it is noth-" Seeing the determined look on his face, JJ sighed. "Fine, fine, I will tell you, but you aren't going to like it. Tonight I am going to the club where the women have disappeared from. I'm going to try to attract the unsubs attention, and before you go off at Hotch, this was my idea, not his."

"I'm sorry, could you repeat that? I almost thought I heard you say that you are going to go undercover to try and catch our unsubs when you are eight weeks pregnant with my children."

"I did, but before you flip out let me explain." JJ reasoned, trying to calm the escalating situation.

"Come on then, tell me how you are willing to put our children at risk!" David yelled, his anger rising.

"Don't you dare raise your voice at me! I am not some unsubs you can interrogate the hell out of to get your answers! Unless you have forgot, I am an FBI Agent, pregnant or not! I have a job to do, and at the moment, I am the only one who can possibly catch this guy, and I will not let you stop me!"

"You are pregnant, Jennifer! Does Hotch know that? I am certain that he wouldn't let you do this if he did! Think of the children Jennifer!"

Her hand connected with the side of his face with no conscious permission of her brain. "Do not tell me to think about the children. What the hell do you think I do every day? Don't you ever dare to insinuate that I don't think of my children!"

"Jen, I didn't mean that-"

"No? Well you said it! I'm pregnant, David, that does _not _inhibit my ability to be a good Agent and do my job!" JJ screamed, her anger reaching breaking point as she paced the small room David had dragged her into. Taking a deep breath, she did her best to get herself back under control. "You can say what ever you like, think whatever you like, but, David, there is a chance that I can stop another woman from getting killed, and you would have to be crazy if you think I am not going to take it! The team will be around at all times, and I will have a tracker and panic alarm in my clothes. I will be safe, you know that the team won't let anything happen to me, but David, you cannot ask me to just sit back and not try everything in my power."

Sighing, David ran his hand over his face as he pulled JJ into his tight embrace. "Sweetheart, I'm sorry for snapping, but…the thought of you being out there…of him being able to touch you. It makes me feel sick."

"I know, but David, we have to do this. The sooner this case is over, the sooner we can get back to our babies."

"Just because I know it is the right thing to do, that doesn't mean I want you to do it."

"I know, but I couldn't live with myself if someone got hurt and I could have stopped it." JJ explained as she caressed his face. "I need you to tell me you are okay with me doing this."

"I thought you said you would do this no matter what I think or say?" David asked, as he kissed her forehead.

"I am doing this no matter what you say, but I would prefer for you to be okay with this."

"I don't want you to do it, but I do understand why you. I won't stop you from doing it, Jennifer, but if he touches you, don't bother to try and stop me from getting to you, because I won't be able to."

"Dave, the minute I see the situation spiralling, I will get myself out of there, and remember, I know what this guy is capable of, I am not going to let him get the upper hand, and most of all, I have you, and the rest of the team behind me."

"I know. Is Hotch really okay with sending you in? With everything…" Dave questioned as he rubbed circles on her back, as his other hand settled on the slight swell of her stomach.

"He doesn't know about the babies, Dave, and I don't plan on telling him until this is over."

"Jennifer-"

"No, David. You know he won't let me do this if he knows. You know and that is enough to keep all three of us safe."

"You better hope that is so."

"It is."

Pulling her closer, he pressed a languid and passionate kiss to her lips. "Jennifer, please don't let anything happen to you. I won't be able to go on if anything happens to you, or them babies."

"We will be okay, David. We will."  
**  
DUN DUN DUN…do you think I will be nice and let her be okay?**


	24. Chapter 24

**This is just a small chapter. A filler in if you will. Remember I will try to make this happy in the end, so don't fly to England and try to hunt me down (*Hides from Tracia*)**

David stood back as he watched JJ get dressed for her evening undercover. Her skirt was too short, and her shirt showed too much skin for his liking. But what could he do? If it was any other Agent - anyone other than his Jennifer, he would be screaming for them to get the show on the road. But this was his Jennifer, and he had a sinking feeling that this wasn't going to go to plan.

"How do I look?" JJ asked, emerging fully from the bathroom.

Resting his hand on her barely there baby bump, he sighed. "You look beautiful. You always look beautiful, even more so since I found out you were carrying my children, which makes me like this plan even less."

"I know, but tonight, when we have caught the sick son of a bitch, I will come back here, and make it up to you for being so understanding."

"You bet your ass you will. Do you know how hard it is not to pull the superior card?"

"I know, and thank you for trusting and believing in me."

"Sweetheart, it was never you I didn't trust. The thought of him being able to touch you…it makes me feel sick. You I will always trust. But now, we better get moving before Mr Insanely Protective comes back."

Smiling, JJ pressed a quick kiss to his lips. "I never even noticed he had left."

***

Something wasn't right. JJ was sure it had been their unsubs that had been hitting on her all night, but now, he had just disappeared. Nodding her head towards the door, JJ signalled to Emily and Hotch she was going to go outside. She had saw him come this way when he excused himself to answer his phone, so he knew he would be around here somewhere. Yes, they would be able to get a physical description out there, but they still had no solid proof that he was the way they were after.

Stepping out of the door of the club, it slammed behind her, and JJ immediately felt her heart begin to race. Dropping her hand to her stomach, she looked around the dark alley way. Nothing.

As she waked further, she couldn't shake the feeling of being watched, which was stupid because she knew she was being watched. They had everywhere under camera surveillance, and David and Morgan were parked two blocks away, just in case they were needed.

Turning on her heels when she found nothing at the end of the alley way, she slowly made her way back towards the club, when she heard a heavy breathing float it's way towards her. She could tell it was getting closer, but she couldn't see from where. It took all of her willpower not to reach for her panic button. She knew she had no evidence yet. No way of knowing.

Arriving at the entrance to the club, she noticed a black SUV parked outside it. Blocking her entrance. It hadn't been there five minutes ago. She knew she had no choice but to alert the team. The situation was escalating, and if she wasn't careful, she would be the next victim.

Reaching for the panic button just above her heart, she heard the breathing stop. Everything around her went completely silent. Her hand hovered over the button, ready to press it, but she didn't get the chance.

She felt something hard connect with the back of her head, just before her signal could be sent. She felt the arms of their unsub wrap around her small waist, as he dragged her towards the parked car.

JJ tried to scream. Tried to kick and punch, but all she could think about was the dull aching in the back of her head. She was going to be killed, and so were her unborn children. And it would all be her fault.

The last thing she remembered thinking before she slipped into unconsciousness, was how she wished she had listened to Dave. He was right. This had been too risky, and now her and her family were going to pay the ultimate price.


	25. Chapter 25

**I think I am going to play this situation out for a bit - and I don't think it will be too pleasant. Although I am in a really good mood today so it is kind of hard to write horrible angst stuff! Need to go and listen to some depressing music!!!**

Something wasn't right. David could just feel it. There was something wrong with his Jennifer, and he needed to get to her. Jumping out of the standard issue FBI SUV and storming into the club, his eyes immediately began to scan the room for that familiar head of blonde hair. He didn't find her. He didn't need to look twice. He already knew that she wasn't in there.

Walking over to Hotch and Emily, he raised his voice above the pounding music. "Where the hell is she?"

"She went to check out the back." Hotch replied, nodding towards the door.

"You let her go out there alone? Are you fucking crazy? There is some man out their killing blonde haired blue eyed young women, and you send Jennifer out there alone?"

"She has the panic button Dave." Hotch reasoned.

"He gets these women by rendering them unconscious with a blunt force injury to the head. So forgive me if I don't think the panic button will be at it's most effective!"

Pushing his way through the crowd , David stormed his way through the back door of the club. Part of him was hoping that Jennifer would be huddled in the corner, injured, than in the merciless hands of their unsub. Any thought was better than the idea of her being with him.

It took David's eyes a few seconds to adjust to the sudden dark conditions of the alley way, and another thirty more for him to do an initial sweep.

She wasn't there.

By the time he had made it back to where Hotch and Emily were standing, it was already all stations go. They weren't going to waste a second. Not when it was life or death for a friend.

"Dave," Hotch started. "You should go back to the hotel. You can't-"

"You have got to be kidding me! There is no way I am being taken off this case! And don't bother giving me any crap about being personally involved. We have all had cases which were are personally involved in! We have all had cases where we were personally involved!"

"You can't keep a level head, David, and if can't know your next move, I can't risk it!"

"Of course I can't keep a level head, but there is no way I will pull any move that could put Jennifer at risk! That is the woman I love and the Mother of my children. I don't care what you say or think, I am going to be there when we find her. How do you expect me to ever face my children again, if I can't tell them I did everything in my power to bring mommy home to them?"

"Dave-"

"No, _Aaron_. I will be there every step of the way. I am going to be there to make sure my fiancée and children are brought home safe."

"Excuse me?" Emily gasped, stepping forward.

"Jennifer is pregnant." His voice softened as he lent his body against the wall. "Then weeks pregnant. We were going to tell you all soon, but she wanted to get out of the first trimester first so we knew that everything was okay with them."

Emily wrapped her arms around him, they were close, and then whispered. "Don't worry, we will find her."

"But in what state? This guy keeps women for seventy two hours, repeatedly raping them before murdering them using strangulation."

"JJ is strong." Morgan stated, the tears and emotions evident in his voice. "She will do everything she can to survive and get home. She will do it for you and those children, you know that. Now, all we have to do is find her. Just concentrate on finding her."

Nodding, Dave pushed himself off the wall. "I don't want anyone telling Josh and Chloe. I'll arrange for someone to look after them. If we don't-"

"We will." Hotch interrupted, his tone leaving no room for argument. "Reid, get the surveillance tapes for the alley and the club, and get them to Garcia as soon as possible. I don't care if you have to commandeer the jet for them, I want her to have them in the next couple of hours so she can run them through her programs and databases. Morgan, Prentiss, get crime scene down here, I want you to go over every inch of this alley. He must have left some trace, and if he has, I want you to find it. Get everything as fast as you can, even if you have to divert from the office channels, I will deal with the consequences later. Dave, if you are set on being part of the investigation, you and I will shut the club down. I want to interview every single person in there. Someone must have seen something. They were sat at the bar most of the night, so someone will have served them. Keep in contact at each time, and do whatever you can to not release that it is an FBI Agent who has been taken. I do not want him to have anymore power."

The team broke off immediately. There was no time for pleasantries. The heart of their team was in danger, and they knew time was of the essence, and they could all see how much this was affecting Dave, even if he insisted on being there. Not one of them missed the way he clutched JJ's engagement ring the whole time.

This was different to when Reid was taken. JJ was the innocent one. The one they all felt the need to protect. It wasn't just Dave this would break if they didn't find her in time. It would be the end of them all.


	26. Chapter 26

**This is the dark chapter. I decided not to go into too much detail (mostly because this chapter has given me so much trouble) but I think it is pretty clear what is going on, it is also a shortish chapter because it as been giving me trouble. I have been trying to write it since yesterday afternoon, but here you go! Now, I am going to go and hide in the corner from Tracia!**

Cold. That was the first thing Jennifer felt when she regained consciousness. The cool night air danced across her skin. She didn't need to look to know she had been stripped of her clothing except her underwear. She could tell that both her arms and legs were bound to the bed.

Her first thought was to fight. To fight for her life, and for the lives her unborn children. But what good would that do? If she didn't co-operate, he would just kill them faster. His profile told her that much. She didn't have a choice. She knew what he was going to do to her, and if she wanted to stand a chance of surviving till the team could find her, she would just have to let him.

Would they find her before it was too late? Would she ever get to tell David he was right? Would she ever get to hug her children and tell them how much she loved them? She knew the odds and she knew that they definitely weren't in her favour. She also knew that thinking like that was never going to help. She would get home to her children. As long as she had hope, she could get through whatever he would do to her.

She laid stock still as she heard the creek of the door opening. She knew what was coming, but she couldn't prepare herself for the actuality of it. Apart from something happening to her children, this was one of her biggest fears, and it was about to come true.

She felt his hands caressing her arms. His touch was soft and gentle, and for a few moments, she was able to convince herself that this wasn't happening. For a few minutes she could lie to herself. She could convince herself that it was David. That she was safe in his arms, and this was all just a bad dream. But all too soon his movements became sharper, her touches harder.

JJ felt him edging her panties down her legs. She wanted to scream, she wanted to cry, but nothing came out. Maybe this wasn't happening. That's how it felt at least. It wasn't really her. She was just watching. Maybe it really was just a bad dream.

She felt him thrust his body into hers with such force that tears began to form in her eyes, but she wouldn't cry. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing her tears.

JJ simply closed her eyes and prayed it would all be over soon.

***

She wasn't sure how long she had been gone. It felt like days, but in reality, she knew it was only a matter of hours. Every part of her body ached, and hurt. She knew she was bruised, but other than that, no one would know the torment she had just gone through.

The unsub had untied her hands before he left the room, and she was thankful to see her clothes laying on the floor, but it didn't matter now, really. She was numb. Nothing mattered now.

He had told her how good she was, and that he'd be back, and it had taken all that she had not to throw up at that. She had always thought she would be strong. That she would be able to survive anything, but she knew she couldn't go through that.

Was David looking for her? Did he hate her now? Each member of the team knows what their unsub was doing to the women. What he would be doing to her. Did they think it was already too late to save her? Would they ever be able to treat her the same if they managed to find her in time?

And what about Josh and Chloe?

Had anyone told them mommy might not be coming home? Were they asking if mommy still loved them? Did they understand? JJ took a deep breath as the tears threatened to fall again. If she didn't make it out of here, would they even remember her? What about her unborn children? Had she managed to keep them safe and protected? What if he had hurt them? Would they be able to hold on?

Pulling her clothes on, JJ felt the panic button brush her skin. He hadn't taken it. He didn't know she was FBI. Maybe, just maybe, the team would still be listening.

Maybe, just maybe.


	27. Chapter 27

**I **_**thought **_**I posted this before I went out today…whoops! But, no, I come home and find it on the laptop still. Anyway! Here it is! I can't say I am completely happy with this chapter, but none the less! It's done!**

David couldn't stop pacing. His mind running over what his beautiful Jennifer was going through. That's if she was still alive. They had found traces of her blood at the scene. She could have been severely wounded, and even if she hadn't, the investigation wasn't taking a promising lead. Everyone seemed to remember Jennifer, but not one of them could give a description of the man she was with, so now, every member of the team was back in the precinct of the Chicago Police Department going through every piece of information they had, but for David, he simply couldn't tear his eyes away from the pictures of the victims. Would there be another one up there soon of Jennifer?

What would he tell Josh and Chloe? Granted, they were warming up to him, but he would never be mommy. He would never be the one who knew what they wanted before they had even asked. No one could ever compare to Jennifer.

"Guys!" Reid screamed as he jumped up from his seat, crossing the room they had been allocated as quick as his legs would carry him. "She's pressed it!"

"Excuse me?" Morgan asked, standing from his seat as he watched Reid scurry around the room.

"JJ! The panic alarm! She just pressed it!"

"What?" David almost yelled, spinning around on his heels from where he was staring at the board.

"The thing is beeping!" Reid squealed.

"Are you sure?" David questioned. His could bear getting his hopes up for nothing.

"Yes! Garcia told me over and over again! She's pressed it!"

"Get Garcia on the phone, now!" Hotch ordered as the team sprung into action. "I want to know where that panic button is tracking to and I want to know now."

Suddenly the precinct was alive with activity. They all knew this was their one and only change to save JJ, and to save themselves. JJ was fighting, and they had too as well.

"Baby girl," Morgan almost pleaded. "Please tell me you've found her."

"I'm trying. I really am, but the signal is a little sketchy. So far I have narrowed it down to a three mile radius.

"Then give us all the addressed." Hotch ordered. "We'll go door to door if we have too."

"I'm sending them to your PDA's now. Bring my girl back."

"We will Garcia."

As the team filed out to the Bureau SUV's not one of them spoke. They couldn't speak. They all know that by the time they found her, it could be too late. What if he saw them coming and panicked?

The first seven houses were busts. Each family giving them permission to search their houses, by the eighth they were losing momentum. JJ didn't have time for this.

As they pulled into the ninth house, something caught David's eye. It was nothing out of the ordinary, but it caught his eye. "This is it."

"Sorry?" Hotch asked, killing the engine before the drive way.

"This is it. I saw that SUV earlier. I remember noticing how the back bumper wasn't attached properly."

"Okay. I want this to be a soft entry." Hotch ordered. "I don't want him to know we are there until the last minute. It will give him less time to react."

As the team left the SUV they could hear JJ's screams. They had already alerted the medical services they would be in need of assistance, but they couldn't come close until the area was clear. Nodding his order, Hotch made sure David stayed close to him. He wasn't willing to risk how he would react. He could already see the death grip he had on his gun.

Giving the order to enter, everyone was momentarily stalled when their eyes met the scene in front of them. JJ was currently backed into a corner, the unsub trying to drag her back to her feet, as her clothes hung loosely around her body. Everyone knew they were too late to save her from at least one torment.. The unsub automatically stopped his actions, but JJ didn't seem to register what was happening. Her eyes were distant and dark.

Dave watched as the unsub made a grab for his Jennifer, and it took all the power within him not to shoot to kill. Death would be too good for him. Death was too good for him. He wanted the son of a bitch to rot in jail for the rest of his life, but even that wouldn't be long enough.

A shot to the leg was enough to halt the unsub in his attempts to grab JJ, and it gave more enough time to cuff him, but JJ was still screaming. Still crying. David wanted to just pull her into his arms and tell her everything would be okay, but he knew she was too fragile for that.

Kneeling in front of her, David reached his hand for hers, and he was sure his heart broke when she flinched at his touch. Taking a deep breath, he held his hand to her. "Jennifer? Jennifer, baby, it's me. David."

Lifting her head to meet his, her eyes glassed over. "David?" Her voice was no more than a whisper, and he could tell she was broke.

"That's right. It's me. I've got you."

"The…"

"He's gone, sweetheart. He's gone." Taking the blanket that Emily offered, he carefully draped it over JJ's shoulders. "He can't hurt you again."

Letting her body rest completely on his, JJ took in a shaky breath. "He…the babies…I…I'm bleeding."

**Dun dun dun! And yes, I am cruel enough to leave it there!! **


	28. Chapter 28

**A few ends tied up here! I decided to be nice…I wrote this after no sleep though, so they may be a few mistakes. I've double checked it, but my brain isn't really working at the moment! Enjoy!**

It took a few moments for the words to register in David's ears, as he carefully rocked Jennifer back and forth. "They'll be okay sweetheart. They'll be okay. I'm going to lift you up, okay? Don't you move, let me do everything."

"No!" JJ screamed. "I can't go out there! Don't make me go out there!" Within an instant JJ slipped back into her trance like state, her eyes staring forward - expressionless.

For a few moments David didn't move, as he weighed up his options. His loyalty was torn. He knew he had to get her to the hospital soon for the sake of their unborn children, but he didn't want to go against her wishes. What if that added to her physiological damage? Would she ever be able to forgive him?

Giving a quick glance at the rest of the team, his gaze sat on Hotch, before he carefully lifted her into his arms, tucking her body close into his, while trying his not to aggravate the rapidly forming bruises.

Carefully carrying her out of the rickety old house, he laid her down on the awaiting stretcher, before resuming his position by her side. He watched as the paramedics checked her over. Taking in each and every one of her injuries, but he knew they would fade in time. He knew it was the memories that would take longer to disappear. If they ever did.

***

He hadn't wanted to be separated from JJ when they reached the hospital, but much to his annoyance, the doctors had insisted on it. Telling him that they would come and find him as soon as she was settled. This was how the team found him ten minutes later.

Each members head turned towards the door as the doctor made her way out. She gave them a small smile before making her way over to five extremely anxious FBI Agents. Reaching out her hand, she shook the hand of who had been identified as her patients next of kin. "Jennifer is okay. She had settled, and I have given her a mild sedative to help her sleep."

"Have you…examined her yet?" David asked, his voice shaky.

"Not yet, I wanted to let her relax as best as possible first before doing any sort of examination. She will obviously be sore and tender for some time, but once she wakes, we will perform the necessary examinations for assault cases."

"What about the babies?"

"A nurse is hooking Jennifer up to a foetal monitor as we speak, but because we don't know the extent of the trauma she suffered, it wouldn't be fair of me to try and get you the odds of them being okay. But we will do everything we can, and I have asked for someone from obstetrics to come down and do and ultrasound."

"Can I go in with her? Please?"

"Of course. Go straight through. She may be a little bit drowsy when she wakes up, so just be patient and if you need anything, please don't hesitate the press the button, I'll be right outside.

"Thank you." Crossing the hallway quickly, David pushed the hospital room door open. Before taking his place next to her.

***

As he sat beside her, it wouldn't be hard for David to convince himself that this all was a horrible dream. Apart from the bright white hospital bandage on the ride side of her head, and the dark purple bruises peppering her body, she looked peaceful.

Brushing her hair out of her eyes, he kissed her forehead as he finally let his own tears fall. "I'm so sorry, baby. So sorry. I should never have let this happen. Oh god, please forgive me, Jen. I'm so sorry."

Slowly opening her eyes, JJ moved her arm and gently wiped away his tears. "You did nothing wrong…it's my-"

"No, sweetheart. Do not finish that sentence. None of this was your fault, and never will be. I will not let you think for a minute that it was. You can't do that to yourself."

"But…the babies…"

"The babies are fighters, just like their mommy. Listen sweetheart."

Letting the room fall into silence, it was long before it was filled with a gentle and rhythmic thudding.

"That's…them?" JJ stuttered as the tears began to fall.

"It's them, baby."

"They are…okay?"

"The nurse said they both have good heartbeats. The are a little slower than what they would normally me, but she said that is natural…after what you have all been through. They are going to give you an ultrasound later, so they can check for any unseen problems, and…they need to give you an internal examination later…"

"Now."

"Now what? What do you want?" David asked as he took her hand in his."

"I want it now. I want it over. Make them do it now."

"Jen, you need to re-"

"I can't. I need to do this now."

"Hotch needs to talk to you too, baby. He needs to take your statement."

"I know, but please…I need this over, David. I want to shower…and…I need to be clean"

"It's okay, I understand sweetheart." Standing, he placed a kiss on her head before more to the door. "I'll get the doctor."

"No!" JJ cried, pulling him back to her side in an instant. "Don't leave me! Please don't leave me! You can't leave me!"

Slipping his arm around her fragile body as he pressed the call button, he held her close as the sobs racked her body. "Never, sweetheart. Absolutely never. I'm not going anywhere."


	29. Chapter 29

JJ winced and gripped David's hand as the doctor prodded and poked her as she carried out the examination. She knew the doctor was being as gentle as possible, but that didn't mean that it didn't hurt.

"Well done, Jennifer." The doctor finally spoke as she eased JJ's legs out of the stirrups. "You did really well. I don't see any cause for concern, but you will be sore for some time, and as a precaution I will start you on a course of antibiotics while we wait for the results from your blood tests so we can rile out any sexually transmitted diseases, and per your request, the results will be sent directly to your doctor in Washington D.C.. I don't want you to worry, Jennifer. This is all just precautionary, and will not harm your babies in anyway. I know that it is a lot to take in, so if you have any questions, please ask."

When can I go home?" JJ whispered as she clung to Dave.

"Technically, that is up to you. The x-ray of your head showed no signs of internal bleeding and we discharge people with the same degree of concussion all the time as long as there is someone to watch for signs of deterioration. I think the bleeding you experienced is to do with a small tear, and no your pregnancy, We can to do whatever makes you feel comfortable."

"I want to go. I can't stay here. Please, David. Don't make me stay."

Running his hand up and down her back, David nodded at the doctor. "You don't have to stay here if you don't want too, baby."

"I'll sort the discharge papers and medication while you have your ultrasound, and as long as that doesn't show anything, you'll be able to leave immediately after."

"Thank you." David shook the doctors hand quickly before moving back to JJ's side. "Everything is going to be okay, baby."

"It's not. It's never going to be okay again."

"Yes, yes it will."

"He…he…he raped me David."

Shuddering at her words, he made sure she was looking at him before continuing. "We will make it okay. We will do it for our children, but mostly we will do it for you."

"Do I…do I disgust you?"

"Excuse me?" David spoke, completely dumbfounded.

"I'm dirty…used…"

"You are none of those things sweetheart. You are beautiful, strong, intelligent, and so much other things, but never them."

"I'm so scared…what if I never feel like me again?"

"You will. It's just going to take a bit of time."

Before JJ had a chance to air any more concerns, the ultrasound technician walked in with a cheery smile on her face. "Hello, I'm Doctor Miles, but feel free to call me Amy. I understand you experienced a small bleed, and you wanted an ultrasound to check your babies are okay?"

JJ nodded, her voice hardly there. "Yes…"

"Well, I've been told they have nice strong heartbeats, so try not to worry. If you just raise your gown, we'll get started." Squirting some gel onto her barely there bump, before running the probe over it. Looking at the screen intently, the Doctor smiled before turning it to face the anxious couple. "Everything here looks perfectly okay to me. They are both moving as I would except at this period of the pregnancy, and the placenta is supplying them with nutrients and it hasn't came away at all."

"They are okay? No problems at all?" David questioned, not taking his eyes off the screen.

"They are doing great. No problems at all. Absolutely nothing to worry about here. You have to very healthy babies."

"You're sure?" JJ spoke, pushing herself up onto her elbows.

"I'm sure. I'll get you both some printouts while you get yourself cleaned up."

"Thank you." Her voice was breathless as she turned to face David with tears in her eyes. "They are okay, David. They are really okay…"

"They are sweetheart. I told you, they are fighters like their mommy."

"I was so certain something would be wrong…"

"I know you were, but look at it this way, that was just another hurdle we have over come, and one more hurdle that will lead us to getting back to normal."

"I just want to get home. I want to hold my children and never let go. I want to shut out the rest of the world and just have it be us."

"We will be home by tomorrow afternoon and then we will both take some time out and get hauled up at the cabin and not leave for days on end."

"I'd like that."

"Good, because that is what we are going to do, but tonight, I don't want you to worry about anything. We will go back to the hotel as soon as we can leave."

"What about…Hotch…questioning…"

"That can wait till tomorrow sweetheart. Nothing but us going back to the hotel is going to happen tonight. Tonight is just you and me."

***

When JJ and David left the hospital room twenty minutes later, they were immediately set upon by the rest of the team, as they rushed to JJ's side. Each of them needing to know that she is okay.

"I'm…I'm okay." JJ stuttered

"Do you want anything, Jay?" Emily asked stepping forward.

"I just want to get back to the hotel…"

"Of course. The SUV's are waiting in the parking lot. Prentiss, Reid, Morgan, you go in the first, we'll take the second and all meet back at the hotel." The team followed his order, leaving the three of them standing in the corridor of the hospital. "JJ…I don't know what I could ever say…I'm sorry-"

"You don't have to apologise, Hotch. I knew what I was getting myself in to before I went into that club. It's not your fault."

Hotch couldn't help the small smile that found his lips. It might take time, but he knew JJ would be okay.


	30. Chapter 30

**This chapter has been a pain in the butt. It just wouldn't come to me, and it is extremely forced, so it is a bit shorter than I would have liked it to be (and it took me longer to write) but here it is!!**

_She could feel his hands on her skin, tracing the lines of her body, before moving to cup her face. She could feel his breath on her neck. She tried to scream. To push his body away from hers. But nothing work. She couldn't stop him. He was in control and there was nothing she could do. She felt the night air dance across her skin. Had he left the window open? Then it all went dark._

"Jennifer. Jennifer, baby wake up." David tenderly ran his hand up and down her bare arm. "Come on, sweetheart, it's just a dream. Open your eyes."

When Jennifer's eyes finally sprung open, it broke David's heart to see the terror that filled them. Her bottomless blue eyes had been replaced with emotionless gray, that he could barely recognise.

"Dave?" Her voice was a whisper, broken.

"It's me sweetheart. Everything is okay. I've got you."

"Oh god…it was…he had me…it was so real." JJ cried as David held her.

"I know, sweetheart. I know but he's not here. It's just else." Running his hand up and down her back, David kissed her hair as she cried. "Just let it out baby."

"I knew he was there before he hit me…"

Pulling back ever so slightly, David looked at her intently. "What do you mean, sweetheart?"

"I could hear his breathing. I knew what was coming, but I couldn't do anything about it." Pausing, JJ tried her hardest to compose herself, but the tears just wouldn't stop falling. "He tied me to the bed…I can still smell him. I can still feel his hands on me. What if he comes back?"

"He won't sweetheart. No one will ever hurt you again. I'll kill them first."

"I see him ever time I close my eyes. I should have listened to you…you were right."

"This isn't about who was right or wrong. All I care about is you and our children, and the fact that all of you are safe and healthy."

"I thought he was going to kill me…"

"I knew you would be strong, and I knew you would do whatever it takes to get back to us. I had to believe that you were going to be okay, because the moment I stopped, I knew that I would have lost you forever, and that was the scariest thought I have ever had."

"All I could think about was you telling Josh and Chloe I wasn't coming home…"

"I know, sweetheart, I know, but you are coming home."

"Where is home?" Jennifer asked, shifting her body and wincing slightly as pain radiated through her.

"What do you mean?"

"We can't keep living out of two houses David. It's not economical or logical."

Brushing back her hair, David smiled. Parts of his Jennifer were already returning. "I realised something today. Nothing matters. Houses, cars, money. It will never matter. All that matters is you and our children, and my home is always going to be where ever you are. The house is just a location, and it can be any location you want it to be."

"The children like where we live…but…"

"But?"

"It's not going to fit three more people in, and, I feel safer at Little Creek, and it'll give them so much more freedom. All the land…I don't want to have to worry every time I send them out to play that something is going to happen to then."

"If you feel safe there, then there is no question of it. You know I would move you into Little Creek in a heartbeat, but I think-"

"We need to take it slow." Sighing laid her body back down on the bed in his arms. "Will things ever be simple again?"

"Of course. Given time. That's all."

"You are too good for me, David. I love you so much."

"I love you too, baby, and that's never going to change."

***

By the time they landed at Quantico the next morning, JJ was absolutely exhausted. Sleep had ended up being no existent for the couple, so in the end, David had occupied JJ's mind with nonsensical conversations. He didn't care what they were about. As long as they kept her mind of the trauma she had been through, that was okay with him.

Smiling as they made their way down the steps of the jet, David moved to whisper in her ear. "Baby, look."

Following his gaze, JJ felt her heart begin to race as she looked over the tarmac.

"MOMMY!"

Two sets of little arms threw themselves around JJ's legs, and all that she could do away collapse down into their embraces. "Oh, my babies. Oh my god, I've missed you both so much. So, so much. God, I love you both so much."

"Don't cry mommy." Josh cooed as he gently brushed JJ's tears away. "Did we do something wrong?"

"No. No, never, ever could you do something wrong. Mommy is just so happy to see both of you."

"Auntie Penny broughted us!" Chloe squealed. "And got us McDonalds!"

"Aren't you two lucky?" David smiled, smiled, ruffling Josh's hair. "How about we go and get you two strapped into the car, and let mommy talk to Auntie Pen?"

"Okay! Bye bye everybody!"

Once she was sure both children were out of earshot, Garcia pulled JJ into her arms as her own tears began to fall. "Oh, Jayje…"

"I'm okay, Garcia." JJ stated, trying to make her voice as even as possible.

"Tell me the truth."

"I will be. I just want to get home…"

"Of course, I just have one question."

"What?"

"When exactly were you planning on telling me you were pregnant?"

Dropping her hand to her stomach, she smiled. "Soon."

Hugging her again, Garcia smiled. "I'm happy for you, Jay."

"Thanks, Pen. I…"

"Go. Call me if you need anything, and I mean anything."

"Thanks." Climbing into the car, JJ felt her body relax that bit further. "Take me home."

"My pleasure."


	31. Chapter 31

**I'm terrible. This updates are a slowing down a little - sorry! I've been super busy recently, and it's been difficult to write the last few chapters. I'm not sure where this story is going at this point, so that's why I think. Anyway, I'm trying, bear with me, this is a short, short one, but hopefully after this, but complete block will be gone. I'm thinking I'll have to jump time.**

_3 Weeks Later._

JJ stood in the kitchen of David's Little Creek Cabin, watching through the window as he and the children ran around outside without a care in the world. She wanted to be there with them. Having fun. Laughing and joking. But she couldn't.

She couldn't take a breath without thinking about the attack. She couldn't close her eyes without seeing his face. She knew she was doing a good job of faking confidence and being okay, after all, she had been doing that all her life, but on the inside, she was breaking down. She wanted to be the mommy that they deserved. She didn't want to let them down anymore.

Sighing, she pushed herself off of the counter. She needed to get out of there for a while. She needed to think, and she needed to do that alone.

Grabbing her jacket, she headed directly to the creek, she could finally let herself breath a sign of relief. As long as she was okay, she didn't have to pretend. Sitting by the creek, she didn't have to be anything. She didn't even have to think if she didn't want to. She could just sit.

Looking over the calm waters, she finally let her body relax, and the tears fall. Everyone had told her that it was going to get better in time. That the memories would fade, but they weren't, they said the nightmares would stop, but they were just becoming more real. More lifelike.

She heard David approaching. She didn't need to worry, she knew his footsteps before came up behind her.

"Jen? Jen are you okay?" When she didn't answer,

JJ didn't look up, she simply stared forward. "Where are the children?"

"Back at the Cabin with Garcia. I called her as soon as I noticed you were gone." David dropped to his knees in front of her. "Baby? Tell me what's wrong?"

"Everything. I can't do it anymore, David." JJ sniffed, turning to face him. "I can't pretend that I can do this anymore, David."

"Sweetheart, you never have to pretend." Brushing her hair from her face, he pulled her from the ground onto his lap. "Listen to me, if there is ever, anything you want to talk about, I am here."

"I know that you don't want to hear-"

"Yes, sweetheart, yes. I don't want to hear it, no, I don't want to even think about what happened to you, but if you want to talk, then I am here for you, every step of the way."

"I can't forget, David. It's getting harder. There are times when I can't even breath. I can't do it, David."

"Sweetheart, you are the strongest woman that I know."

"I don't feel it."

"Not right now," David reasoned. "But in time you will. It has only been three weeks, baby. It's going to take longer than that for you to be able to put this all behind you, but I promise you, it will be eventually, and I will be here every step of the way."

"I don't want you to have to put up with this. I can't even make love to you like I should be able to."

"That doesn't matter to me. Do you honestly think I would leave you because you don't feel ready to sleep with me?"

"Maybe…"

"Never, ever, will that matter. If I can only hold you in my arms, that will be more than enough for me until the day that I die. I want you, Jennifer. Everything else is just a bonus. We have two gorgeous children, and soon we will have two more. Why on Earth could you not think that is enough?"

"Because…because I don't know myself anymore, David." Resting her hair on her baby bump, she looked into his eyes. "I don't feel like myself anymore. It's like I am watching everything going on, but I can't grab hold of it. I hold our children, but it's not me that is doing it. I want too, but I just can't."

"You will sweetheart, and if it is anything, you are still my beautiful Jennifer, and that will never change."

"Thank you, David. I will never deserve you."

"Oh, sweetheart, on the contrary. I don't deserve you." Pulling her to her feet, he wrapped his arms around her. "Come on, it's getting cold. Let's go home."

"Just five more minutes." JJ sighed. "Just five more minutes…"


	32. Chapter 32

**I am covered in pink paint…not a good look on me. Dark pink is not my colour! Anyway, here's the chapter! It's late again (Really late!), isn't it? Whoops. Blame the Season 3 Criminal Minds DVDs…  
**

_Two Months Later.  
_  
In the three months that had past since her attack, JJ had managed to make progress. Being alone with a man she didn't know, no longer sent her into a full blown panic attack, and very slowly, JJ and David were beginning to resume proper relations.

But today, none of that mattered. All that mattered today was their unborn children.

Today they would get to know exactly who they would be welcoming into the world. Would they had two sons? Two daughters? Or one of each? They had been waiting, and planning for this day. It was one of the only things that had got her through, and now, as she laid on the hospital bed, all the anxieties were bubbling to the surface.

What if there was something wrong with the babies?

"Dave…" JJ whispered, gripping his hand.

"You don't have to worry, sweetheart. Everything is going to be okay."

"There is still a chance that he could have hurt them…"

"Every test has been clear to now, and both of the babies are active and growing well. You know that worrying will only raise your blood pressure, and I won't let you do that."

Before JJ could answer, the doctor poked her head around the door, giving the anxious couple a warm smile. "Jennifer, David. Lovely to see you both today." Looking through Jennifer's notes the doctor made her way over to the bed. "Twenty week scan…also an exciting event, and double with twins. Before we start, I just want to reassure you that your blood tests were clear. I also see, that your notes say you would like to learn the sex of the babies today. We'll do our best, but as you may remember Jennifer, it can be difficult to identify the sex of twins, but we will do our best. If you just lift your shirt, we will get started"

"Thanks." JJ smiled, as she raised her top. David's eyes were already glued to the monitor. Much like they had been during every other scan.

"Okay, well there is baby A," Lifting the probe, the doctor pointed to the screen. "on the left, and baby B on the right. They are both in good positions and they are both head down. Hopefully they will both stay in that position and you'll be able to have the natural birth you requested…now, onto the important bit. I can definitely see the sex of baby A, and I am ninety nine percent sure of baby B, so if you are both sure you want to know, I can tell you."

Looking at David and seeing him nod, JJ turned her attention back to the doctor. "We are sure. I don't think that either of us can wait any longer."

"Well then I think you should get used to both blue and pink!"

"One of each?" David stuttered, momentarily

Smiling, the doctor froze the image on the screen. "There is definitely one of each. If you look here…" Pointing to the screen the doctor paused. "That's definitely your little boy, and that, if your little girl. I will give you both some time. Once you are done, just make an appointment for next month at the reception."

"Thank you…" Turning to Dave, she ran her hand tenderly down his face. "Another girl and a boy…"

"Another girl and a boy, and if they are anything like their mommy they are going to be gorgeous."

"Thank you, Dave…I…I wouldn't have made it through these last few months without you, and-"

"Sweetheart, you never have to thank me for looking out for you. I do it because I love you, and I love each and every one of our children."

Later that evening, David rhythmically massaged JJ's shoulders as JJ sifted through case file after case file, before releasing a deep sigh. "Dave? How are we going to do this with four children?"

"Do what, sweetheart?"

"Our job. When Josh and Chloe were babies, I didn't travel, but how will we handle two babies, and two children in kindergarten?"

"We will find a way, sweetheart. I've been looking into Nanny's or…"

"Or what?"

Turning so he could face her, he closed the case file. "I have been thinking about taking a teaching job at Quantico. I won't have to travel, and I can be here in the mornings, and the evenings."

"No, David, no. I won't let do that. You love the BAU, and they need you. If anyone should leave, it should be me."

"No, it shouldn't. I've had my career, you are still having yours."

"Dave, can either of us do that? Can we really turn our back on the BAU completely?"

"I don't know, Jennifer, but we've still got plenty of time to figure something out. We'll think of something before the babies get here."

"I just want everything to be perfect. I failed them to start with, I put them in danger, and now I want to give them everything I can."

"You didn't fail them, sweetheart. You could never fail any of the children, it was a shitty situation, that we have came through now. I know that it is hard, but you don't have to worry about failing them, because no matter what happens, I know that isn't true."

"Thank you, Dave. I know you are working hard to make me feel better, and I promise you, it is working, sometimes, it just gets a bit hard."

"I know it does, but, for what it is worth, you are doing amazingly. You are the strongest person I have ever known."

Sniffing back her tears, JJ pressed a kiss to his lips. "Thank you, David. You and our children are what make me strong. Without you all I would never have been able to make it through."

Smiling, David wrapped his arms around her. "And that, sweetheart, is why I know everything is going to be okay."


	33. Chapter 33

**I'm not sure if this chapter will make sense. It was kind of influenced by an article I read about pre/post natal depression. Not really sure where this whole angle will go, but I thought angst would be good! It's late again. Sorry! I have a couple of busy weeks, so it might be updates every other day for the time being, but I will see how I go!**

"Jennifer, sweetheart, you need to take a step back and breath."

Turning to him, with her hands on her hips, JJ glared. "I am _fine_!"

"Sweetheart, you are six months pregnant with twins! You should be resting!"

"Believe it or not, David Rossi, I have done this before. And this needs to be done! These babies are coming, and they need clothes and a place to sleep! We can't put it of any longer!"

"I think you mean, I can't put it off any longer. You are going to sit yourself down, and not move."

"I am not letting you loose on the nursery without my help! I know what we want and need! I managed to do Josh and Chloe's nursery at seven and a half months pregnant, on my own!"

"Yes, but, this time, you have me to do it for you, so you can rest. I know you managed to do this alone last time, but it is different now. You have a much more stressful job now, and two hyperactive five year olds to look after so you need to rest when you can."

"Have you ever put together a nursery, David? Do you have any idea where you are going to start?" JJ questioned her hands folded neatly in her lap as she eyed his movements.

"I do. I pick up the phone and contact Pottery Barn." Dave retorted, a smirk finding his lips.

Raising her eyebrow, JJ pushed herself up from the seat David had sat her in. "Dave, I _have_ everything that we will need. It's just the process of putting it all back together. I know how to do this, if you'll just let me stand."

"I can get someone to do that for you."

"Dave, I know how to do it, there is no point wasting money."

"Fine, you sit, and tell me how to put the things together. Let's call it a compromise."

"Why compromise when it would only take me a few hours?"

"Because you are pregnant! For Gods sake, Jennifer, the doctor told you your blood pressure is higher than it should be!" David yelled, finally losing his temper. "You are supposed to be taking it easy! Are you willing to risk the babies for the sake of a nursery?"

"Do not talk to me like that! I know what I am doing, Dave. I have done this before. I _know_ what I am doing!"

"I'm not trying to say that you aren't!"

"Then what? You just want to make me do it your way, huh? You want to take away all of my control of the situation just like he did in Chicago?"

"Sweetheart, no. Never, ever, would be that, and do not, and I mean, do not say that. It has nothing to do with me wanting to make you do it my way, or take away any control, I just want to keep you all safe and healthy."

"I…" Feeling the tears run down her face, JJ dropped her head to her hands. "I just want to feel like I am doing something for them. I want to feel like I am helping."

"You are doing the most important thing. You are keeping out son and daughter alive, and making sure they come out healthy."

"I just feel so useless…" JJ sighed.

"It's just your hormones making you feel that way." Kissing her forehead, he pulled her to her feet. "You sort out the clothes, and I'll put the furniture together. How does that sound?"

"It sounds like you are trying to distract me from what I am thinking, and what I want to do, and I think, for that, I may just love you."

"Then we have a deal."

Arranging herself in front of the containers of clothes, JJ sighed. She thought she was through it. She thought she had left the black cloud of uncertainty behind weeks ago, but now, now it seemed as though it was engulfing her slowly. Floating it's way into every aspect of her life, and as the days went by, it was getting harder and harder to drag herself out of the other side. She could no longer even see the other side. She could no longer see the good things - they didn't outweigh the bad anymore.

She couldn't see the day when she would hold her children, and all the pain would just disappear. She didn't think she would ever be the same again. On the outside, maybe. Maybe on the outside she was still Jennifer Jareau of the FBI, but on the inside? On the inside, she was just dying.

She had never felt like this before, and she didn't like it. She couldn't talk to Dave about it. Not like last time. This was different. It felt different to her. She knew that she couldn't talk about it. She knew that she shouldn't talk about it. She knew that this was her own fight, but she didn't know if she could.

It was no longer memories of her attack. She still had nightmares, but they weren't haunting her. She knew that was behind her now. This was about everything. Her whole life. She didn't believe Dave when he told her they could have their children and still do their job. She had been there before, she knew just how hard it was, and with four children, they couldn't just take off at the drop of the hat.

Her life was spinning out of control, out of her control, and no matter what she did, she couldn't get it back.


	34. Chapter 34

**This was hard to type - literally. I strained the right side of my neck (I'm rather accident prone) and so it is hard to move, let alone type, but I thought I would give it a go. Hope you enjoy! Next week updates will be completely sporadic because I am away. I will be able to update (Writing a Hotch/Emily story at the moment, and a chapter for my other story, so hopefully they would be up soon!) so, enjoy!**

JJ winced as another Braxton hicks contraction wracked her body. At eight and a half months pregnant, she was done. She wanted them babies out, and she wanted them out now. She didn't remember feeling like that with Joshua and Chloe. Yes, the pregnancy had been difficult, but she had loved every minute, this was just…never ending.

"Sweetheart, maybe I should call the hospital…" David stated warily. He never knew exactly how his blonde bombshell of a fiancée was going to react to his comments these days. She could be as sweet as chocolate cake one moment, and the devils little helper the next. He wasn't ashamed to say she scared him. If people had any sense, they would be scared too.

"Dave, quit it. They are just Braxton hicks. They are supposed to happen!" JJ glared, rubbing soothing circles on her lower stomach as she shifted about in the bed. She just could not get comfortable.

"You could be in labour, Jen."

"I'm not in labour, David." JJ ground out. "Braxton hicks. Natural and they do not mean labour is starting, or the babies are coming."

"Jen-"

"Dave. This happened last time, and funnily enough, I _think_ I know what labour feels like!"

Moving so he cold rest his hand on her bump, he immediately realised what he had done as she glared at him. "Did I _say_ touch me? It's because of you and your grabby hands that I am in this position in the first place! As a matter of fact, you are never coming near me again! Okay? Get it?"

"I get it, Jennifer." David uttered sweetly, earning himself yet another glare.

Wincing again, JJ felt the whole situation shift. Maybe this was a little more than Braxton hicks. "Dave…"

"Yes sweetheart?"

"I think you were right."

"What do you me, I was right?"

"I think I'm in labour…"

"Wh…what?" David stuttered, his eyes darting between hers and her baby bump.

"My waters just broke." Seeing him immediately rip himself from the bed, she sighed. This would be a testing few hours. "Dave, don't panic."

"You're in labour! I think that is a cause for a panic!"

"We have plenty of time David. We don't have to rush!"

"Sweetheart, you are in _labour_! Miniature people are vacating your body. I think we need to rush!"

"I was in labour for twenty seven hours last-" Pausing as a contraction gripped her, JJ slowly pushed out a deep breath. "time. Just breath Dave."

Raising his eyebrow, Dave laughed. "Aren't I supposed to be saying that to you?"

"Maybe, but I think you need it more than me at the moment." Gritting her teeth, JJ pushed herself up and grabbed the bedroom's cordless phone. "I'm going to call Emily. See if she can come and watch Josh and Chloe so we-" Grabbing the table JJ took a deep breath. "don't have to worry about them."

"No, sweetheart, you are going to sit your backside back down on the bed, and I am going call Emily, then I am going to make you a quick snack, and once Emily gets here, we'll head off."

"Dave, I'm not hungry."

"You need to keep your energy up. Please don't argue with me on this."

"Fine." JJ grumbled while lowering herself down to the bed.

***

15 minutes, one sandwich, and one phone call later, David made his way back, stopping in his tracks when he saw his eight and a half month pregnant fiancée wrestling a new duvet and sheet onto the bed. "Jennifer, what the _hell_ do you think you are doing?"

"What does it look like I am doing, David? I'm changing the sheets! If I did, I sure as hell know they would be the exact same ones."

"Sweetheart, I would have done that." Taking the sheet, David smiled. "Here, let me fin-"

Snatching it back, JJ growled. "I am _not_ an invalid. I can do it!"

"Jen, _you are in labour_! What do I have to do to make you slow down?"

"Nothing! It is good to keep moving! It eases the babies along! Stop nit picking. We are fine!"

"I'll be a lot happier when we get to the hospital, and a highly skilled, over paid doctor tells me that!"

"I have done this before, and believe it or not, I know my body!"

"I know, baby." David reasoned. "But, I've never been here before. To me, this is a completely new situation to me, and I don't know how to act. I don't know what is best."

Sighing, JJ pulled him closer to her, before gently kissing his lips. "I'm sorry for being irrational. I'm just all over the place at the moment, and I'm taking it out on you. "

"You're not being irrational, you are being pregnant. It's okay for you to be like that. Because, as you rightly pointed out, I am the one who got you in this situation."

As the door bell rung, JJ gave him a quick smile. "Let's go and meet our babies."


	35. Chapter 35

**I tried to make this chapter as long as possible, but I am writing it whilst watching Twilight, and using my aunts very unpredictable internet, so I just went with what I have! I think I'll skip past the post natal depression angle, but I do have another one I am thinking about! Enjoy!**

JJ took a deep breath as she gripped David's hand like a vice, the pain was much worse than she remembered. She watched as David winced, the baby. Did he really think that he was in more pain than she was? Impossible! "Dave, will you stop being such a baby!"

"Do you know how much pain I am in?"

Glaring at him, JJ growled. "No, David. I, the woman who currently had two miniature people pushing the way out of her body, has no idea how much pain _you_ are in!"

Before David had a change to realise the error of his ways, the doctor entered the room, smiling from ear to ear. "Jennifer, how are you feeling?"

"Terrible I just want-" Taking a deep breath, JJ pushed it out slowly. "them out. This is so much worse than I remember."

"Well you are coping brilliantly, and so are the babies. Their heart rates are strong and steady. Now, as long as it is okay with you, I'd like to give you a quick examination and see how you are progressing, then we can talk about your pain relief options." Nodding, JJ winced, tightening her grip on David's hand. "Okay, so you are about four centimetres, so we are getting along nicely. Now, I remember you saying you didn't want an epidural, but we can give you a shot of pethidine. It will aid to take the edge off the contractions."

"Will it affect the babies?" JJ asked, relaxing slightly between the contractions.

"It can have some effects on both you and the babies. It can make the baby sleepy, or cause them to have breathing trouble and it can take them a bit to get the hand of breast feeding because it crosses the placenta."

Shaking her head, JJ looked to David who simply smiled. He wouldn't stop her if she wanted it. "I don't want it. Not if it can harm the babies."

"We do offer meptazinol. It doesn't affect the babies, but it could make you feel a little sick, or dizzy."

"Does it have any long term affects?" David questioned, his instincts to protect the woman he loved kicking it.

"Not at all, it's just the side affect, and once it begins to leave your system they go, which normal takes about two or three hours. It would just make Jennifer more comfortable."

"You're sure….that won't hurt the babies?"

"Not at all, Jennifer."

"Okay then."

***

Two hours later, and a more relaxed Jennifer lay reclined back on the bed, and David could also feel himself relaxing. "How are you feeling, baby?"

"Mmm…better. I'm sorry for snapping at you."

"I think seeing as you are going through this for us, I will be able to forgive you."

"Good, if you hadn't of said that, I would have to break your arm."

"Baby, I think you already have."

Wincing again, she pulled David's hand to her. "God, they are coming closer."

"Shall I get the doctor?"

"In a minute…this is supposed to happen….it's a good sign."

"I hate seeing you in pain, baby."

"I know…but it's a good pain. It'll bring us our babies."

Kissing her head, David smoothed his hand down her back, rubbing soothing circles down her painful muscles. "I am so proud of you, Jennifer. So, so proud of you."

Turning her head to kiss him, she smiled. "I can't wait until they are here, but we still need to choose names. They need names, David."

"I know they do, sweetheart, what do you think?"

"I like-" Pausing as a contraction hit, David continued to rub her back. "Grace. With Chloe, I couldn't decide, but I just knew she was Chloe when I saw her."

"Then Grace it is. What about our little boy?"

"You can decide, David."

"Jen, you can-"

"I've named three. You can choose one."

"What about…what about Thomas?"

"I like it."

Running his hand over her stomach, he smiled again. "Here that, you both have names now, so you have to come out soon. We can't wait to meet you both."

***

As Jennifer labour began to push seventeen hours, the stubborn Rossi children finally decided it was time to make their entrance.

"Okay, Jennifer, on the next contraction I want you to give us a nice big push. Your babies are ready to make their appearance." Holding in a deep breath, JJ pushed as hard as she could, and six minutes later, the first cries of their child was heard. "Congratulations. It's a girl."

"Grace, oh my god, Grace…" JJ panted as the baby was placed on her chest.

"Oh, god. Jen, she's beautiful." David could feel himself tearing up, but he didn't care. He had just seen his child come into the world, and he didn't care who knew it had affected him so. "So beautiful."

"Okay, Jennifer," The doctor smiled whilst talking. "If you give the baby to the nurse, we'll meet your son." After JJ had handed the baby off, the doctor returned to the bottom of the bed. "Okay, nice big push. I can already see the head, so it's not going to take long."

And it didn't. Seven minutes later, the cries of their son were heard.

Immediately gathering JJ into his arms, David rained kisses down on her face. "I am so, so, beyond proud of you. You are amazing. I will never be able to tell you how amazing you are."

Taking her son into her arms, Jennifer could barely speak. She never expected to have this again. Kissing her son's downy hair, JJ felt the tears burn her eyes as she saw the nurse hand their daughter to David. "I never imagined…I never imagined that I'd be here, and if I ever did, for a nanosecond, I never dreamed you would be here too."

"I never thought this would happen, baby. I never thought I'd get the chance to have a family. Especially with you."

"I know, but you've got us now. All of us."

"Thank you, Jennifer. Thank you. I will never be able to thank you enough for them. Ever."

"I love you, David."

"I love you too, I love all five of you. I always will."


	36. Chapter 36

**I have had a few really, really busy days and so writing just hasn't come, but here it is, anyway. I am finally working on the next story for It's A Wonderful Life so hopefully I will be able to get that up in the next few days. Life is still all over the place for her at the moment, so it will still be updates every other/every couple of days.**

As he carefully cradled his son in his arms, David was still finding it difficult to form any sort of coherent sentences. He still couldn't believe that in his arms was his new born son. All five pounds six ounces of him. How was it possible for someone so small to affect him so? Crossing the room slowly, he slowly settled himself down on the bed next to Jennifer, before placing a tender kiss on her forehead. "I don't think I am ever going to be able to tear my eyes away from them."

"I know, it's like, if you look away they'll be grown up in an instant. I don't even remember Josh and Chloe being this small."

"Until today, I don't think I realised just how much I missed of their lives." David confessed, placing a kiss on his daughters head.

"I'm sor-" JJ started, cupping his face in her spare hand.

"Don't apologise. We have been through this too many times before, and I will only repeat what I said. It was not your fault. It's just making me think, but then, I also think, if I had been there, there is a chance we would have Grace and Thomas. We have to stop thinking about what we could have had, and see what we do have. I wouldn't change it. Any of it."

Yawning, JJ rested her head on his shoulder. "Mmm hmm. What time did Em say she would bring Josh and Chloe down?"

"After they have had lunch. She wanted to give you some time to rest and recuperate, and to give us some time to get to know the twins. She said they were both okay, and they both settled fine last night at bedtime but she added that Chloe was chomping at the bit to get down here and see the babies."

"Mmm. She loves them. She'd be a good mom." JJ mused, shifting Grace to nurse.

"Just like you. How did you know that was what she wanted?" David asked, amazed. "She didn't even make a sound. I don't think I will ever be able to do that."

"She was nuzzling my chest…Chloe did the same whenever she was hungry. I was just following my instincts. You'll get the hang of it, you just have to give yourself time. They are only a couple of hours old,

Dave. No matter what they say, it doesn't just come in an instant. You need to get to know them. We need to get to know them. It will come."

"I know, it's just…seeing you with them has put me more at awe. I mean, you are amazing. You are a great mom, Jennifer."

"And you're a great dad, David. The whole newborn thing is just a learning curve. You'll see. You just need to learn how to handle them, you will know what they want before they make a sound too. And before you know it, they'll be heading off to college…" JJ smirked at the look of disgust that found David's face.

"Jennifer, I love you, and I am grateful for everything you went through for us today, but if you don't shut up, I will have to kill you."

Grinning, JJ pulled him into a kiss. "That's years away yet. Years of memories for us to make with them." Pausing, JJ moved to wind Grace. "So, when are you breaking us out of here?"

"The doctor wants to keep you in until tomorrow, and then we are free to run, but for now, you should get some rest. Josh and Chloe will be here soon, and you know they will tire you out even more."

Glancing at the clock, Jennifer gave in to her exhaustion. "Wake me when they get here?"

"Before they are even through to door."

***

Keeping to his word, David carefully shook JJ awake when he heard the first squeals of his older children descending down the hospital corridor. His children. His older children. They were words he would never tire of hearing or saying.

"Daddy!" Chloe almost screamed with delight as David appeared at the door of JJ's hospital room. "Auntie Em said we can meet the babies!"

"You can sweetheart, but you have to remember what me and Mommy told you and be-"

Gentle! I know, daddy!"

Emily couldn't help but laugh at the look Chloe had on her face, whilst her hands found her hips. "We tried to run off as much energy as possible at the park, but as you can see, they are just a little too wired for that."

"It's fine, Emily. Thank you, again, for watching them."

"It's my pleasure, but if you don't get us in there to see them babies soon, I may shoot you."

"Go through. Jen will be waiting."

The children all but bounded into the room, closely followed by Emily, but not David. He simply stood in the doorway and watched his family. He watched the way they interacted, and the woman had given him his life.

He couldn't fathom the turn his life had taken, but he knew that he wouldn't change anything it.

"Dave?" JJ called quietly from inside the room. "You look a million miles away."

"I'm just thinking." David stated as he moved into the room, slipping behind JJ and gently massaging her lower back.

"About what?"

"About…about how lucky I am."


	37. Chapter 37

**I've actually had this wrote on my computer for a day or two, but I've managed to catch a cold (I swear, I catch every germ going) so it's kind of knocked me off balance. Hopefully things will be slowing down for me very soon so I will be able to update more regularly! This is only short, but at the moment I feel like I have a hundred elephants stomping on my head!**

Later than evening, with David safely asleep on the hospital couch JJ slowly took an unsteady step out of the bed, carefully pulling the two hospital plastic cots closer to her bed. She had to make sure that they were okay. What if something happened whilst she was sleeping? What if one of them stopped breathing, and she wasn't there to help?

As long as they were in her sight, they would be okay. She could protect them as long as she didn't let her guard down. As long as she was their mommy at every moment of the day.

Shifting slightly, she ran her finger down her daughter's cheek, before repeating the action with her son, sighing, while she pushed the tears back. "Mommy won't let anything happen to either of you. I promise. I promise that I will protect you from everything. I messed some things up with your big brother and sister, but I won't do the same with you. I won't let anything ruin what we have now. I am going to be the best mom I can possibly be. I will not fail you, I will not fail any of you again."

Standing silently, David moved next to Jennifer, wrapping his arms loosely around her waist. "Jennifer, you have never failed them, sweetheart, and you never will. You are an amazing mom to Josh and Chloe and you will be to them too."

Pulling out of his embrace, JJ's face turned sour. "You don't know that! You don't know that I am going to be able to do this again! It was hard enough the first time, I don't know if I can do this again!"

"Of course you can, Jennifer. You already are doing this. You are already an amazing mother."

"You don't know that, David! What if I hurt them? What if I-"

"Do you want to hurt them?" David interrupted, holding Jennifer still and halting her pacing.

"No…I…I don't know! Everything feels so foggy! I don't know _what _I feel! Everything was so clear last time. I loved my children and that was that. Me and them in our perfect little world, but this time. This time-"

"This time I am here invading your world."

"No, David. No. Not at all. This is your world too, but, I have to give that space to you to be able to bond with them and…"

"And what?"

"What if that makes it hard for me to bond with them? What if I can't do it and I end up resenting them for what they have with you? Or if I resent you for what you have with them?"

"You won't." Bringing her closer to his body once again, he cupped her face gently. "When you were talking about protecting them, you were talking about protecting them from you, weren't you? You think that you need to protect Grace and Thomas from you?"

"I'm a different person to what I was when I had Josh and Chloe. I've seen so many more things. I've killed people, Dave. I do have to protect them from me."

"You killed someone who very nearly killed someone you love, and would have gone on to kill many more. I've killed people too. Many more than you have. Does that mean that they have to be protected from me?"

"No, it doesn't. That's different."

"It's the same, sweetheart. We have seen the same things. Experienced the same things. Baby, you will never hurt them, so you cannot beat yourself up thinking like that."

"You don't know that!" JJ yelled, almost too loud, causing the babies to jump, but not to wake.

"Yes I do." David replied calmly. "I know you, Jennifer, and I know that you could never hurt them babies. You could never hurt any child, especially your own flesh and blood."

Collapsing into a heap on the bed, JJ fought the tears the best she could. "I feel different. Like I don't know myself, or what I am capable of. I don't like not being able to control myself."

"You will always be able to control yourself where the children are concerned. It's natural for your emotions to be all over the place, we have had an emotional few months filled with turmoil, but that doesn't change the core of who you are. You are still the same Jennifer that I fell in love with all those years ago. The only thing that has change is that you are even more beautiful than the day we met."

"I just…I just don't know, David. I just don't know what to feel. What to do. I just know that I cannot mess this up!"

"You won't. We won't."

"Promise me something. I need you to promise me something, David."

"Anything."

"If I ever come close…come close to hurting them, you will stop me. By any means necessary."

"Jen…"

"By any means necessary. Promise me, or I don't think I can keep going."

"I promise, Jen. I promise."


	38. Chapter 38

**I'm a little stuck on this one, so it is taking a little longer to get a chapter wrote (that, and I spent together picking the remains of my wardrobe off my floor, after it…collapsed on top of me! Oops) I will get there, it's just taking its sweet time! I also have another story in the works - but that is taking its time too. This is about a month after the last chapter. My brain is a little blank, and I can't say I like this chapter, but hey. Better than nothing I guess.**

_It was dark. Too dark, but at the same time, not dark enough. She could still see him. Slowly moving towards her, but then he turned. He didn't want her. No. He wanted something more important. His dark, evil eyes darted to the two small Moses baskets in the corner of the room. He wanted them. He was going to hurt her babies._

"Jen, sweetheart, wake up." David whispered, trying to gently wake her out of the nightmare induced panic.

_He stalked towards them. A harrowing snarl escaping his lips. He was going to hurt her babies, and there was nothing she could do. She tried to scream. She tried to move. She willed her body to move, but she couldn't. She couldn't. She had told Dave she wouldn't be able to be the mother they needed. Her deepest darkest fears were coming true._

"Jennifer. Listen to me. You are dreaming. I need you to open your eyes. Come on sweetheart. Open your eyes for me." He pleaded, tenderly running his hand down her face.

Sitting bolt upright in bed, JJ's whole body shook as harsh sobs wracked her body. Was she still sleeping? Was it even a dream? Maybe that was her reality now. "Dave?"

"Yes, baby it's me. You were just having a nightmare. You need to take some deep breaths or you are going to hyperventilate. Come on, sweetheart, breath."

"No…no…I need…" Pushing herself out of Dave's strong arms, JJ finally let herself relax - if only slightly - when she saw her children, safe, and fast asleep in their beds. "Oh, thank god…they are okay…thank god."

"What's wrong, sweetheart?"

"He wanted the babies. They're not safe!"

"Sweetheart, they are perfectly safe, no one wants them."

"He wants them!"

"Who wants them, Jen?"

"I…I don't know! But he wants them. He's going to hurt them, Dave. We have to protect them. We need to! We can't let him get them!"

"No one is going to get them, Jennifer. They are perfectly safe. We can protect them. Nothing will happen to them as long as we're around."

"No."

"No what?"

"They are not safe as long as I am around. I should lea-"

"Don't you dare say that. Don't you dare even think that. I thought we had had this discussion?"

"No, you talked, I listened. It doesn't mean any of it is true. I'm not good for them."

"Jen, have you seen the way them children look at you?"

"Dave-"

"No, sweetheart. I won't let you do this to yourself. Again. They love you."

"They are a month old, it doesn't work like that."

"Yes it does. You're beating yourself up, and making yourself feel bad for no reason."

"Dave-"

"No." He interrupted, kissing her head gently. "Let me finish. Please. It's been a rough year, for you especially, and I think its only just catching up with you. And I think…I think that maybe you should talk to someone about it."

"Talk to someone? You mean a shrink? Do you think I am crazy?" JJ snapped, pulling herself from his arms, as she began to pace around the room.

"No, Jennifer, I do not think that you are crazy. I think that you are not letting yourself deal with things the way that you should. Hell, the way that you need to. You are bottling them up because you don't want to hurt anyone, but in trying to protect everyone, you are hurting yourself."

"You think…"

"I think you need to talk to someone who won't take sides or try to find a quick fix. And I think you need to do it soon before it becomes out of control. I don't want to see you break down."

"What if they think I'm a bad person? A bad mom?" JJ barely whispered as the tears threatened to fall.

"They never could, but then, who cares? Who honestly gives a damn what they think? The only people who matter already know what a wonderful mom you are and that you would do anything for them children."

"I don't like feeling this way, Dave. I want it to all just go away."

"It will. We'll make it go away. I'll put in a few calls tomorrow, and we'll see where we go from here, okay?"

"Okay…"

"Don't worry, sweetheart, everything will be okay."

**Short and urgh. Don't like it but hey. I think I know what is happening in the next chapter but other than that. I'm at a loss.**


	39. Chapter 39

**Sorry, I just haven't felt like writing lately. My life is all over the place at the moment, so it is a little hard to concentrate and sit down to write, but nonetheless, I hope this chapter is up to scratch, but I am kind of…stuck. I might try to write something else tonight (a different story) just to get my head away from this for a bit. I'll see.**

"So, Jennifer." The psychologist, Sarah Grahams started. "Mr Rossi told me that you are through a bit of a difficult time. Would you care to elaborate?"

"I…I don't really know what to say. Where to start."

"Just start at the beginning. We have plenty of time. As much as you need."

"I…A few months ago, my team were on a case in Chicago. We had nothing. Absolutely nothing, and we knew that another woman was going to die if we didn't act fast and draw him out. We…I couldn't let another woman die. They all looked like me. We had an idea of where he was going to be, it was always the same club that the woman visited before they were taken, so I went undercover. I wasn't worried about it, I knew that my team were there behind me. He came over to me almost immediately. He spoke to me for hours. Then…then suddenly he disappeared. I knew that I couldn't leave it like that, because we needed some evidence. We needed him to at least _try_ and force me to come with him, or something, so I followed him. I went into the alley behind the club, and I could tell something wasn't right, but I knew I have to keep going. When I came back up, there was an SUV in the entrance to the alley and I knew it was him. He hit me across the back of the head, and the next thing I knew I was tied up in some grotty bedroom. He left me there for…I'm not sure how long, but it felt like days. Years, even. When he came back, he ra…he raped me." JJ faltered, she couldn't go on."

"How does that make you fell, Jennifer? When you think back on that, how do you feel?"

"Dirty. I feel dirty all the time, I can never get clean. I can still feel his hands on me , and every time I close my eyes, I can see his face."

"What do you fear the most, Jennifer?" Sarah pushed.

"That he…that he is going to come back…but…" JJ trailed off, staring at the floor and she fought back the tears.

"But, what, Jennifer? I know this is difficult, but if you want to get past this, then you need to tell me."

"When he…when he comes back, it's not me that he wants…it's my children. And there is nothing that I can do to stop him before he can hurt them. I fail them when they need me the most…I'm a terrible mother. I can't even protect my children."

"Jennifer, it is important for you to understand that what happened is not your fault. You were trying to make the world a better place, and you have done that. Your children are happy and healthy, and that is all that matters. You are doing what you need to do to look after them. You are a great mother, and I can tell that despite your worries, you are on the road to recovery. Have you spoke to Mr Rossi about your feelings?"

"To some degree…I don't want to reinforce the idea of not being able to cope…I don't want him to take them away from me…"

"You may be finding things difficult at the moment, but that would no way result in your children being taken away from you. Is this why you have waited so long to talk to someone about how you are feeling?"

"Yes…" Jennifer whispered, the tears falling now. "I just couldn't take the risk…"

"You won't lose your children for admitting you need help. How do you feel after talking through some of your fears?"

"Slightly better…as if everything is a little more bearable now…"

"Good, that is the direction we should be heading in. I don't want you to worry. Tonight, I want you to talk to Mr Rossi. Explain your fears and worries. Hug your children. Enjoy your children. You have been to hell and back, but they are the people who will pull you out of the other end, but you can't push them away because you are scared of hurting them. And for your peace of mind, I contacted the prison in Chicago shortly after my phone call with Mr Rossi. You do not have to worry about that man ever coming near you again. He won't ever see daylight again."

"He was…"

"He was unanimously found guilty by the jury, and I have it on good authority that it was your statement that convinced them. I want you to remember how many lives you have saved, but if you do let these feelings rule you for the rest of your life, he will be able to rob another person of their life…you. You are a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman. You are not dirty or weak, so you cannot let him make you feel that way."

"I…thank you…"

"There is no need to thank me, Jennifer, I am just doing my job, and telling you the truth."

"You are giving me my life back…how can I not thank you?"

"I'm not giving you anything, I'm simply reminding you. You knew it all or you wouldn't have sought help in the first place."

"I don't need…drugs or…"

"I don't think so, no. You're no danger to yourself or to others, so I see no ethical or medical reason to give you anything. Just enjoy your life, and remember that I am here, twenty four hours a day, all you have to do is call."

"Thank you."

Exiting the office, JJ caught her reflection in the mirror. She looked different some how. Like the life was slowly draining back into her. She did still have her life, and she refused to let him take it from here. She had a partner, and children who loved her, and that she now knew would be safe, no matter what. So now, maybe she could live in the moment and not in the past.


	40. Chapter 40

**On Tuesday the electricity company is putting a new telegraph pole up by my house, and I have the day off, which means, I will have nothing to do all day except sit down with a pen and paper and write so hopefully I will be able to go quite a bit wrote to type up!**

Walking into the house later that night, JJ felt the peace rush through her as she looked around the dark house. From the living room she could hear, and see that the television was on. Dropping her bag by the door, she made her way through the house, and the sight that she found, brought tears to here eyes.

There, curled up on the sofa was David, with Josh and Chloe on him, with Grace and Thomas snuggled wrapped up on their baby beanbags beside them. Getting to her knees next to the sofa, JJ tenderly pressed kisses along his jaw. Smiling as he began to wake up. "Hey, baby…"

"Hey…" David croaked, his voice husky with sleep. "Are you okay?"

"I'm better than okay." JJ smiled, kissing him again. "I'm better than okay."

Settling Josh and Chloe on the sofa, he stood and embraced JJ. "It went okay? I mean…you were…"

"I was okay, David, and yes, it went okay. I feel good. Better than good. I'm glad you suggested it." Resting her head on his chest, she smiled at the children. "Have they been okay?"

"They have been perfect. Josh and Chloe had a lovely dinner of nuggets and fries, while Grace and Thomas enjoyed a nice bottle of mommy's breast milk. While I vetoed both options. I thought I'd wait for you. Are you hungry?"

"I could probably eat something." JJ looked straight into his eyes, and David smiled. Her eyes were bright and shining. Something he hadn't seen in a while. "What? What are you smiling at?"

"You look different, somehow. In a way I haven't seen in a while."

"I feel different. I feel like everything has been lifted off my shoulders. Happy." JJ explained, dipping her hands under the back of his shirt. "Actually…I'm not that hungry for anything but you."

"Jen…baby, are you sure?"

"Make love to me, David."

***

Ten minutes later, with each of the children safely tucked up in bed, David entered the bedroom, kneeling in front of JJ and the end of the bed. "If you want to stop, at any point, you just have to tell me. Promise me that if you don't feel okay with it, you will tell me."

"I promise. I trust you, David."

Locking his hands around her ever small waist, David pulled her close to him. "I don't want you to be scared."

"I'm not scared of you David."

Pulling her even closer still, David moved his head closer until their lips met in a fierce and passionate kiss. Dipping his hands under the hem of her shirt as he felt her body relax against his. Slowly, so not to spook her, David trailed his hands from Jennifer's back, to the buttons of her shirt. Undoing each at such a slow pace, it made JJ want to scream.

"David…please…"

"Shh…I'm doing this slow…I'm going to show you how much I love you."

Nodding, JJ began to unbutton his shirt, while pressing kisses along the length of his neck, as he edged her towards the bed, attacking the buttons of her pants at the same time, and his followed soon after, and then, they both simply stared at each other, taking in each other forms with new eyes.

"Dave…I…" JJ blushed, trying to cover herself up.

"You're beautiful. Never think anything different." Running his hand up her bare stomach, to cup her breast. "So beautiful." Trailing his hand back around her back, he unhooked her bra, before taking her now bare breasts into his hand. "You are the most beautiful woman in the world, and now, I am going to show you just how much."

Quickly removing the last piece of fabric between them, David carefully lowered them towards the bed, hovering his body over hers as he burned a pathway of kisses down her body. Tentatively, David thrust his fingers into her heat, watching her face for any sign of distress. She showed none.

Kissing his way back to her lips, David stared into her eyes again. "Are you sure, baby?"

"I'm sure."

And with that, David thrust his hardened length into her heat. Automatically, JJ wrapped her legs around his hips, urging him on as the pleasure increased, and before long, they were both flying over the edge as the stars danced behind their eyes.

"Wow…" JJ panted, cuddling up to David, her head resting on her chest. "Thank you, baby."

"Why are you thanking me, Jennifer?" David asked, breathless as he stroked her back.

"You have stayed with me through everything, and you have never even questioned me. You've never told me to get a grip or…you've never been anything less than supportive…thank you for that, David. Thank you."

"I love you, Jennifer, I've told you. That means I am here through everything."

"For the first time in I don't know how long, I finally feel like there is a light at the end of all this. I feel like me again. Like his hold on me has finally gone."

"I'm glad, sweetheart, I hated seeing you in so much pain. I hated watching you beat yourself up over something that was not your fault."

"I've missed this. I've missed being able to be close to you without having to worry about…about him."

"So have our, but we have the rest of our lives to make up that time. And I want to start it the right way. Jen, I want to marry you. I don't want to wait any longer, I want you to be my wife. I want everyone to know that-"

"Yes."

"Pardon?"

"I want us to have the wedding as soon as possible. I want to be your wife."


	41. Chapter 41

**This story is drawing to a close - mostly because I am no ideas left for it, but I do have another one in the works I just have to start typing it up. Anyway, here it is. Sorry it has taken so long, I have been stupidly busy and it is starting to drive me crazy at not having a free minute!**

Staring at the blanket of white in front of her, Jennifer sighed. Why was this so hard? After all she had been through in the last few months, this was what she was finding her. Turning to Emily, she ran her hand through her hair. "Em, this is too hard, I can't do this!"

Laughing, Emily pushed her friend forward. "Of course you can! Jayje, you could get a dustbin bag and Dave would still find you irresistible, he will love you in any one of these dresses."

"I need to find the right one though. I mean…he's done this three times before, I don't want-"

"Honey," Garcia started as she made her way forward, slipping her arm around JJ's small waist. "Rossi is not going to be comparing you to any of them, but, even if he did, it wouldn't matter, because you are so much more to him. You are the woman he loves and the mother of his children. Plus, you will look drop dead gorgeous in any one of these so you can pretty much just take your pick!"

"Maybe, but…"

"Maybe, but, nothing, pumpkin! Get your backside into one of them dresses right now and we'll go from here!"

Sighing, JJ stepped forward, she knew better than to argue with Penelope Garcia when she was on a mission. Flicking through the dresses, JJ pulled out one that caught her eye, checking it was her size before ducking her way into the changing rooms. Slipping into the dress, she stared at herself in the mirror of the changing room. Wow. That was it. She already knew this was her dress. She didn't want to look anymore.

"Jay? Are you coming out or not?"

"Er…ye…yeah…" JJ stuttered as she pushed the door open. Taking a deep breath, JJ stared at her friends. "Well?"

Walking forward, Emily wrapped her arms around JJ and smiled. "You look beautiful. Absolutely beautiful."

***

_2 Months Later_.

Jennifer Jareau-very-soon-to-be-Rossi stood at the big bay windows, staring out across the land that was their Little Creek home. The whole of their vast garden had been transformed into the perfect wedding scene, that, if JJ didn't know better, would have been convinced the scene was straight out of a glossy wedding magazine.

Spinning on her heels as the door creaked, JJ smiled brightly at her father. "Hi, Daddy."

"Hello sweetheart…Jennifer, you look beautiful." Her father gushed, moving to his daughters side.

"Thank you." JJ blushed, looking down, fiddling with her bouquet of flowers.

"Jennifer…sweetheart, don't take this the wrong way, but are you sure this is what you want? This man has hurt you, repeatedly. I saw how you were when he left you the first time, how can you be sure this is what you want? What if he leaves you? What if he leaves you and those children?"

"He won't. This is different. You don't have to believe me, but this is what I want. This is what I need. I need him as much as I need my children. He only left me because he thought he was protecting me, and the last few months…well, he has been for me in a way that no one else could be, and well…I love him and I know he loves me. I want this."

"Then that is good enough for me, but if he hurts you or one of my beautiful grandchildren, I will hunt him and kill him, FBI be damned."

Going forward to her toes Jennifer kissed her father's cheek. "I know, Daddy, and so does he."

***

Down at the altar, David took in a steadying breath. She was late. Five whole minutes late, and he was sure it had been the longest of his life. He had never felt like this during his other weddings. Quite honestly, he hadn't cared if any other of his wives had shown up, but even thinking that JJ wouldn't show made him feel nauseous. "Where is she, Aaron? She's late!"

"Dave, calm down. It's a woman's prerogative to be late to her own wedding."

"Not Jennifer! Jennifer has never been late for anything in her life!" David ranted, but this was cut short as the first bars of the wedding procession march began.

Turning his whole body to face the arch that had been erected in the garden, David was sure that all the air in his body as he saw her. He wasn't even sure he had the words to describe the sight before him. Beautiful just wasn't enough for this moment. Was there a stronger word? If there wasn't, one needed to be invented and fast. Bending down slightly, he kissed each of his children's head as they were lead to their seats by Garcia and Emily, and then he had her. His whole world was in his hand. Pulling her body close to his for a second, he gently whispered. "Are you ready to be my wife?"

Looking deep into his eyes, with tears already running down her cheeks, Jennifer smiled, tenderly raising his hand to her lips and kissed his knuckles. There was so much she wanted to say at that moment, and yet none of it mattered. Nothing at that mattered at that moment except him. She was ready. "I have never been more ready for anything in my entire life."


	42. Chapter 42

**Sorry these updates have taken so long. I have had a busy few days. Christenings, college interviews and lots more that has kept me moving at all times, but I hope you like the update! This is the last chapter of this story! Enjoy!**

Running his fingers through his new wife's long blonde hair, David smiled to himself as she subconsciously moved into his touch. "So Mrs Rossi, how was your day? Was it everything you hoped it would be?"

"It was more than I hoped and dreamed it ever could be. It was more than I could have ever asked for you to give me. You are more than I could ever have asked for."

"No, sweetheart. I think you are more than I could have asked for. You and our children and more than I have ever deserved."

Shifting her body to lay her head against her husbands bare chest, she sighed contentedly. "Do you think the children are okay?"

"I think the more appropriate question would be if the rest of our team are okay. The kids are probably running rings around them as we speak. You know that no one can resist their faces. They look too much like their mother to be able to say no to them."

"You know, I was thinking, if I had said no to you offer of a walk that day at Georgetown, do you think we would still be here? Together?"

"Yes, I do. I just think life would be different and a little less rewarding. I don't think we would have any of our beautiful children, and I don't think I would have the sense to know not to risk you, because I wouldn't know the pain of losing you. I wouldn't know what my life would be like without you in it, and maybe that would be a good thing, because the thoughts of not having you, keep my up at night but they also make me realise just how lucky I am to have you."

"I'm glad I didn't say no that day. But, saying that, I don't think I could have ever said no to you. You just seemed to have some kind magnetic pull and I just had to meet you. Be with you. I would do it all again, even if I knew you would have to leave. Joshua and Chloe were worth it. They would always be worth it."

"I'm sorry for-"

"Don't. Don't even think about apologising again. I wasn't saying it to make you feel like you had to. I was just trying to tell you that…well I don't know, but everything that has happened has led to this. To this exact moment. To our four beautiful miracles who are waiting at home for us. To us. Those moments changed us. They made us who we are. They made us better."

Kissing her fiercely, David stared into his wife's eyes. "I love you, that is something that will never change. Not if I live to be a hundred and fifty. I will always love you. I always have."

"I love you too, David. And I meant what I said today. Till death do us part. I don't care what happens over the next years, I want to be with you every day. I want to hold you. To kiss you."

"I want the same, Jen. So," Leaning over her, he grabbed two champagne flutes and the bottle they had bypassed on their way into the honeymoon suite. He poured them a glass each before handing one to her. "Here's to the moments that changed us. I owe them everything that I have."

Raising her glass JJ clinked it his before leaning in to kiss him. Smiling, she knew that everything had finally gone right. "The moments that changed us."


End file.
